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old man nut shuffle 

The method used by old (and sometimes young) men when preparing to eat a handful of nuts. First fill the palm of the hand with nuts, lightly close the hand, and shuffle back and forth before bringing the hand up to drop a few perfectly positioned nuts in the mouth. Technique can be applied to any small loose snack or candy. The shuffle motion is comparable to that used when shaking dice for gaming.
Can you believe Uncle Frank ate a whole 1 pound bag of trail mix??!! His wrist must’ve been sore from all of the old man nut shuffle action.

The old Naughty Nut Finger Trick 

When your making love and your ole lady sticks her finger up your butt without asking
Jason can’t stand when Bonnie does the old naughty nut finger trick.

Old Goat Nuts

An affectionate and debatably romantic name for your husband of many years when you are hoping to initiate sex.
After lunch let’s go take a little nap, my dearest Old Goat Nuts!

Old Hot Nuts 

The classification of any male over the age of 40 that maintains accounts on social media such as YouNow and creeps on broadcasts.
Tonya: Wow you have so many followers Kayla. How do you do it?
Kaya: Oh that's easy. do a few twerks in a broadcast and your view count and fans will skyrocket from all the Old Hot Nuts online.
Old Hot Nuts by Eaton Holgoode March 13, 2015

Helping the Hairless Hound Steal the Nuts from the Withered Old Man by the Stinkhole 

The longest ever metaphor for masturbation.

As seen in the upcoming film, the Dark Show
Rob: Why is there vaseline in your glove box?
Roy: I use it at stop lights.
Rob: Use it for what?
Roy: I got a spare couple of minutes, might as well spend it by Helping the Hairless Hound Steal the Nuts from the Withered Old Man by the Stinkhole.
Rob: Is that supposed to mean jerking off.
Roy: If you want to be crude about it, then yes, you fucking cunt.

Nutty Old Bat. 

1. A pompous old windbag or busy body.

2. A hypocritical someone who is trying to make a point about something they believe is rite but all facts and common sense prove them wrong

3. An elderly person who rambles on but has no idea what they are talking about.
Example of an old lady trying to defend her adulterous daughter.

Nutty Old Bat:
Are you even old enough to know what fidelity is?

Random girl:
Aren't you a little old to be causing drama on facebook?

Nutty Old Bat:
i'm just a few years older than you, and I am not causing drama on facebook. Do you even know what drama is?

Random girl:
Just a few? I took you for a nutty old bat.... that's drama ::

Nutty Old Bat:
No nuts on me my dear.

Random girl:
That's a shame. What business do you have messaging me, by the way?

Nutty Old Bat:
I won't even lower my dignity with an answer to your question.

Random girl:
What dignity? It was apparent you had no dignity when you chose to rudely message a stranger and throw out a pathetic attempt at being witty.
Nutty Old Bat. by WildMountainBoy January 25, 2011