Masturnation 

A city or an area where masturbation happens frequently, publicly or otherwise.

"Man, I wish there were more girls around here. Sucks being stuck deep in Masturnation."

"It's not the single masturbater thats the problem, being in Masturnation is the problem."

Masturnation by Whuffhunter420 August 18, 2012

masturnation 

when you use the flag of the united states of america to clean up jizz after you masturbate

oh that was a squirter. good thing i have my flag right here so i can be a masturnator and practice masturnation

masturnation by authorofthedictionary November 20, 2010

Masturnation 

Masturnation: noun, the form of jerking off that President Obama has done all over and around the USA, repeatedly.

I wonder when this constant masturnation from President Obama will end.

Masturnation by Salty Pirate9 April 6, 2010

Masturnation 

When a group of 100 or more people masturbate at the same time.

Dude, were you at the masturnation last night?

Nah breh, I did fuck Sarah though

Masturnation by Yungdaggerdick June 19, 2016

masturbating to the dictionary 

A phrase used as a comeback to a Grammar Nazi or to someone who says “grammar is sexy” during a conversation. It can be used in any situation to respond to someone who tries to shame you on your grammar.

i.e.
txt msg exchange
Timmy: Yo Jake, you wanna come over to Jason’s place to smoke after school? Meghan and Jill are coming over and I’m sure your have a dope time with us.
Jake: You mean *you’ll have a dope time.
Timmy: Dude, are you masturbating to the dictionary at your house? Don’t be such a Grammar Nazi.

Lucy: Hey Jamie, do you think Alex is doing good today after the party last night? You think he’s interested in hanging out later?
Jamie: You mean, doing WELL after the party…? Damn Lucy, grammar is sexy just an fyi.
Lucy: Wtf Jamie, when did you start masturbating to the dictionary?

masturbating to the dictionary by runninghighkid August 4, 2018

Comedic Masturbation 

When you are so funny by yourself that you laugh out loud without any participation by a partner.

Progresses from a small grin to a smile to a quiet giggle and then quickly reaches the climactic event of an audible belly laugh, or LOL. Following climax, tissue is often used to dry resulting wetness occuring in the ocular region.

My humor is not always understood by others and I frequently find myself involuntarily engaging in comedic masturbation.

Comedic Masturbation by K-Rista-Raaah July 22, 2016

Bureaucratic Masturbation 

noun - 1. Engaging in any activity for the sake of making one feel better about themselves, their organization, or their company without actually accomplishing anything. 2. Holding meetings to provide recommendations only to have management do what they wanted in the first place. 3. Holding special work group meetings to make the 'little people' feel ownership, when the decision has already been made by higher levels of management.

My boss has picked me to suffer through more Bureaucratic Masturbation, representing the department on a policy work group.
I spent the last 3 months researching the best candidate for the position and the Boss picked his pet employee anyway. God I hat Bureaucratic Masturbation!

Bureaucratic Masturbation by Bill Koogler January 17, 2008