i passed out after i hit off some klonies
by nate March 18, 2005
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A strange breed of person from Northern New Jersey who aliken themselves to a Southern Gentleman. One should be careful around a Kolonel for they tend to be very clingly and tend to use the phrase "mind if I come along", even if your just going to take a piss. The last known sighting of a Kolonel was at Union College.
by Hoodcrawler420 August 17, 2006
Get the kolonel mug.A cat that thinks that it is in fact a dog. It has short stubby legs and curly fur. It also plays fetch and catches mice for you.
by _DeliriLuxSolis_ February 14, 2010
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I can't be arsed cooking tonight. Whaddya feel like - Macca's, Red Rooter or Kolonel's Fucking Crap?
by Choda Boy 57 March 16, 2008
Get the Kolonel's Fucking Crap mug.A person who might be “book smart” but who at times acts severely challenged in the real world. Often those around a Kolonius will be amused and confused by their contradictory behavior. One who serves as a living paradox that “no one this smart can be that big of a moron”.
A Kolonius might stun those around them with their ability to model complex systems using physics or calculus, and at the same time will dumbfound spectators when said character tries to open a can of tuna with an umbrella.
A Kolonius might stun those around them with their ability to model complex systems using physics or calculus, and at the same time will dumbfound spectators when said character tries to open a can of tuna with an umbrella.
A Kolonius will often concoct elaborate stories having no basis in reality as a sad attempt to cover up for their socially awkward behavior, such as this ludicrous explanation of a failed pick-up attempt:
“I told her if she came home with me I’d photograph her naked in my basement! Uh, um…but then she had to leave because Santa Claus flew in on a vacuum cleaner and reminded me I left the oven on”.
A Kolonius will also multiply any quantity or endeavor to an absurd degree with each re-telling to make stories more sensational, and simultaneously blatantly untrue but hilarious: i.e. “Well I’d had about 43 Gin and Tonics”, or “Oh, that was the week I jogged out to the West Coast”.
“I told her if she came home with me I’d photograph her naked in my basement! Uh, um…but then she had to leave because Santa Claus flew in on a vacuum cleaner and reminded me I left the oven on”.
A Kolonius will also multiply any quantity or endeavor to an absurd degree with each re-telling to make stories more sensational, and simultaneously blatantly untrue but hilarious: i.e. “Well I’d had about 43 Gin and Tonics”, or “Oh, that was the week I jogged out to the West Coast”.
by Wan Rodriguez December 15, 2008
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