kelp

an undersea cabbage.

i swam amongst kelp in the sea.

by eug [the almighty kelp] February 11, 2004

kelp

A conversation made up entirely of dead birds...

Joe: That movie was amazing!

Sam: Sure, if you've got a map of it.

Joe: But the kelp is really green this year.

Sam: I like barbecue.

...and the conversation continues like this until someone screams or the world explodes.

by Jack the fridge monkey July 5, 2010

kelp

Used in place of cool, chill, ok, etc.

Does 6:30 sound good to meet up?
Yah, kelp.

by B Fair May 12, 2008

kelp

it is a shit

look at that kelp

by the clit commander April 11, 2003

kelp

Annoying troll which lives underground,preferably it's mother's basement.Where it can spew it's hatred upon all via the internet to feel good about it's self.Can be found licking the floors of peep show booths. Has the mentality of a 12 y/o boy, as well as size and genitalia,if at all.Anything that can be said to a kelp will be twisted in such a way to make itself seem better than everyone.

Guy 1. I have a nice car. kelp. you're a fag, and you live in your mother's basement. Guy 2. My girlfriends hot! kelp. She's a bitch! I only go out with hot chick's, that's all I ever get, they all love me , because I'm such a stud, they all get in line for me!etc., ad nauseum.

by sunshine March 25, 2005

kelp

Pudgy little asshole who mocks others in chatrooms, to feel good about their own "shortcomings".

"All that jerk does is make fun of everyone in the chatroom, he's a real kelp".

by I.M. Noone March 20, 2005

kelp

Unkempt pubic hair most often associated with female prostitutes and homosexuals.

Guy:Did you see that guys balls?
Man:No. All that kelp got in my way.

by Jeff July 25, 2003