Howard Stern: Oh, look Artie, we have Grandma Caprio on the phone...
(Howard doing Grandma Caprio in deep Italian accent): Oh, my-a Artie... You must-a get back-a with-a the Daner. She was-a the best-a thing-a that-a ever happened-a to you-a...
A grandma car is basically your run of the mill 1990's sedan with low kilometers. Typical Grandma cars are the Chevrolet Caprice, Ford Taurus, Toyota Camry, Chrysler Intrepid, Honda Accord, Nissan Altima, Pontiac G6 and Any and/or all Buick or Mercury cars. These cars also must have Unpaid Parking tickets on the dashboard along with hard candy and Efferdent Denture Cleaning Crystals to be considered a True "Grandma Car." A grandma car must also be slow as molasses in a Canadian Winter and in dire need of an oil change.
The act of soaking ones hand in water long enough for it to become wrinkled and soft prior to masturbating to create a grandma's hand feel. Also known as a "velvet glove"