First President of the United States of
America. Led the Continental Army to victory over the
British and all those damn mercenaries they hired. Also known as the 'Dollar
bill guy'.
George Washington never did chop down a cherry tree, and this rumor was believed to be started by some school teacher with the knowledge of Mr. Garrison. He did, however, sleep everywhere, and it is unlikely that he just slept, since the chicks were getting a little bored with 'bundling'.
Boy: Hello?
Geo. Washington: Yeah? Whadda' you want?
Boy: Are you Mr. Washington? George Washington?
Geo. Washington: Is this another one of you damn
kids looking for a meal ticket?
Boy: But my mom says....
Geo. Washington: Look
kid... I get a lot of this. The phone's ringing day and
night, which is creepy since we've got another 100 years before its invention. But never mind that. Who's your mother, anyway?
Boy: Betsy Churchbottomfeeder.
Geo. Washington: Okay! I did spend the
night at her house, but slept
alone. Tell your mother to call an attorney. She ain't gettin' shit.
Boy: Oh, woe is me! A bastard once again! Boo-hoo, boo-hoo.
Geo. Washington: Lemme give you Jefferson's number. He falls for this shit all the
time.
Boy: Thanks, bro!
