The art and science of defecating on another's doorstep on Christmas Day. Several sources credit the first use of the word to the urban legend Leeds Dr Rudeboy.

Effective management of such an undertaking involves a four-fold course of action, namely;

1. Visiting the local drinking establishment, followed by local nightclub, on Christmas Eve and early hours of Christmas Day. At some point during the evening, it would be rude to not visit Wetherspoons. Consumption of copious amounts of alcohol then proceeds throughout the evening.

2. Reconnaissance of a likely target whilst walking home, namely, houses in locations where the local cuntstabulary are unlikely to be driving past.

3. The said act of elimination onto the doorstep. Should the perpetrator be a Scouser*, then breaking and entering is, of course, the next natural course of action for the erstwhile Liverpudlian.

4. Wiping one rusty ringpiece with the fresh snow. Caution is advised for those presenting with haemorrhoids.

*The erstwhile Scouser may wish to declare any profits from the said breaking and entering on the next occasion he/she signs on within the following fortnight at the local Jobcentre Plus.

1st person: Well, that fine selection of of Cliff Richard records certainly has put me in the mood for the Queen's Speech tomorrow! Shall we retire early and let St Nicholas pay his visit?

Rudeboy: What whoa! Ya dumbclaat! I and I is gonna do a festive faeces on dem doorsteps!

Festive Faeces by Leeds Dr Rudeboy December 3, 2010

festively plump

1. Used to describe someone who is (slightly) chubby, and as become so over the christmas/summer holiday period.
2. Or, someone who morbidly obese and you don't want to hurt their feelings, yet you stil want to bring them to the attention of their weight gain.

1. 'oh mighty me darling, you seemed to have gained ten pounds over the christmas period! Time for the old detox!'

2. 'S**t! Look at that big moma, shes ever bigger than yours!'
'Mate, shut it, be nice to her, shes my aunt'

'alright sorry, shes festively plump'

'thats better'

festively plump by Valentina Osborn July 13, 2006

festive collar

When a shirt or sweater's collar is worn vertical similiar to a turtleneck, but not necessarily popped out, it is a festive collar.

Nick: I have a festive collar for the occasion.
Brian: You mean it's popped, don't you?
Nick: No... festive.

festive collar by knack4life November 24, 2009

pre-festive

The state of premature holiday celebration by means of decorations, singing, or costume.

The Smith family, with their Christmas lights up in October, are quite pre-festive.

pre-festive by Paul Sise October 18, 2004

Word of the Day on October 4, 2010

Festive Day

23rd December, the eve of Christmas Eve; JUST as exciting as Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day for that matter, Christmas Eve Eve truly deserves its own title!

Just one rule; you MUST wear something- anything- red or green (in keeping with the festiveness).

Happy Festive Day, bro!
Happy Festive Day, Jobin- are you wearing something green??

Festive Day by Shmagoo May 14, 2011

I'm festively plump

The response when someone calls you fat...

Dude 1: Daym girl...why are you so fat?
Dude 2: I'm not fat, I'm festively plump

I'm festively plump by thegirlthatkrumps December 23, 2010

God Shot

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".

Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."

God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011

Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.

Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?

city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006

Word of the Day on September 17, 2026

Is that cake?

Another way to say is this fake? Like the show real or cake

“Slayyyter just announced another album last night”
“No way, is that cake?”
“Yeah whoops this isn’t real”

Is that cake? by Sexyyred September 15, 2026

Word of the Day on September 16, 2026

just fokin missing her

native american reservation origin... to miss an ex so badly that everyone can see it.. can be used for either sex eg. just fokin missing her/him

friend : *noticably sad*
me : look at you all sad & shit
friend : shut up!
me : just fokin missing her huh?

just fokin missing her by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026

Word of the Day on September 15, 2026

endwarfins

The rush of neurotransmitters and neuropeptides triggered specifically by watching the Seven Dwarfs march home singing "Heigh-Ho" — that particular high of pickaxes, whistling while you work, and communal domestic bliss in a cottage built for men half your height.

I only meant to watch the Heigh-Ho scene for the endwarfins, and then it was two hours later and I'd watched the whole movie.

Endwarfins aren't just a Snow White thing — I get the same hit off the Lollipop Guild in Oz.

endwarfins by Howard Ogden September 13, 2026

Word of the Day on September 14, 2026

caillou

A slang term used to describe a bald person, typically someone who is completely bald or has a closely shaved head. The term is derived from the infamous, hairless kids’ cartoon character of the same name.

Example 1:
“Did you see that caillou over there? His head is reflecting the sun like a disco ball.”
Example 2:
“I think Dave is finally accepting his hair loss. He just went full caillou and shaved the whole thing off.”

caillou by WMH01 September 12, 2026

Word of the Day on September 13, 2026