A functional illiterate.

One who is genuinely sick at the mere though of thinking and blessed with an enviable capacity for incapacity.
Gary sets his watch 20 minutes early so he can trick himself into never being late for an important appointment at the bowling alley, the dog track, the stock car or the speedway tracks. Gary is a dibbock.
by Dennis P Gusset-Ripoff November 1, 2004
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