An order so lame that when placed at a cafe or restaurant it leaves the server reliving memories of their lost virginity. An order of a decaf espresso is a drink so pointless that it is synonymous only with a hand job over the pants... those pants most likely being jeans.
"Dude, you ever had a decaf espresso?"
"Yeah once when I was like 13 but I wouldn't recommend it. My pants frayed and I totally chaffed."

or

"The movie theater was packed so all she could give me was a decaf espresso."
by rudy noodles August 30, 2011
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A cheap substitute for coffee, taking away the insomnia and lovely hyperactivenass that defines the beverage. Do not support this blasthemeous liquid.
oh my god, that guy is drinking DECAF coffee! TRAITOR!
by slightlynutty1 February 11, 2012
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A sudden, gruesome event following self-inflicted caffeine deprivation.
Man, don't go cold turkey on that java; you risk decaf-itation
by Original Robbo February 2, 2012
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when one has drinking binge induced diarhea, and, during mid coutis releases his/her bowels uncontrolably. The decaf is when this person wipes on the sheets akin to a dog pooper-scooting on the carpet.
last week was rough, i finally bagged my old friend, but took a vancouver decaf. Definately an OLD friend now
by Nate Froggy Frogg August 30, 2011
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When you reach back and pinch someones nose shut while giving them a tea.bag
I felt so nice that I gave her a decaf teabag.
by dagodav July 20, 2006
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trash (like you :O)
your mom: hey want some decaf five hour energy?
me: no, that's garbage... Just like you
by ayo sussy balls November 10, 2022
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