Once at the forefront of the railway industry, Crewe is now the chav capital of the world.
The town also has:
One of the worst performing NHS hospitals
A college catering for chavs doing hairdressing and over 1000 students with Downs syndrome
A live music venue hailed as the UK's center for tribute bands
A nationally acclaimed soccer club for producing violent drunken psychopaths
2 Macdonalds, 1 KFC
And the greatest density of polish immigrants in the country (why the fuck they would want to come to Crewe remains a mystery)
The town also has:
One of the worst performing NHS hospitals
A college catering for chavs doing hairdressing and over 1000 students with Downs syndrome
A live music venue hailed as the UK's center for tribute bands
A nationally acclaimed soccer club for producing violent drunken psychopaths
2 Macdonalds, 1 KFC
And the greatest density of polish immigrants in the country (why the fuck they would want to come to Crewe remains a mystery)
by Anonymous2501 November 10, 2007
by Júan José June 08, 2005
by Grovegricer June 21, 2005
Crew is like crack. It interferes with your sleep. It destroys your body. It introduces you to totally weird people. It's expensive. It takes you away from the real world and into a fantasy land. You start doing it way too much, as you build up a tolerance. You can't stop. You love it, but you know that you shouldn't. You stick with it, because you have this bizzare idea that life would just not be the same without it.
I can't I have Crew
by gigi louise April 01, 2009
A bizarre cult centered around the movement of boats across water in straight lines, propelled by the mental force of anywhere from one to eight human, virgin adherents. During the winter months, its disciples rise well earlier than most sane humans for their bizzare sunrise rituals, including self-injury caused by the use of a holy relic known only as an "erg," which strangely resembles a Medieval torture rack, in honour of their victory-god, "Henley", and 18 mile pilgrimage runs to honour the river-god "Nationals", and his mate "Canadian Nationals". The sacred hymns of the Scottish musical duo "The Proclaimers" are played during these rituals.
I am about to be castrated, as part of my initiation into Crew.
For Crew, I had to run 500 miles, now I must row 500 more.
For Crew, I had to run 500 miles, now I must row 500 more.
by thecrewfascist April 24, 2009
crew will wreck your life.
The initiation of a rower's journey begins when they set hands on a boat. You will carry a boat with others like you, and become astounded at how heavy this thing really is.
When all the oars are in, you may row arms only. Seems easy. then the back is added, then the legs. It seems okay. Only as the weeks go by do you realize the enormity of what you have gotten yourself into.
Your hands will bleed and ache and sting; it hurts to pick up a pencil sometimes. You are introduced to the ergometer, erg, or rowing machine- this machine is the finest example of torture in the modern world. Your hands will hurt worse, you will pull harder, you will vomit in trash cans and wobble on jelly legs to your car.
Finally, the hunger. There is no greater hunger than hunger after practice. You will eat anything and everything in sight.
But aside from the general pain, nausea, and discomfort associated with rowing- it will get you fit. You will meet new people that will change your life. You will work harder than you ever have and see results. You will do things that you have never dreamed of. You will fall in love with crew, only it's a weird kind of love. A certain comfort comes from smelling the boathouse on your clothes, stepping off of the erg and into the rainy outdoors, or crossing the finish line with boats behind you.
The initiation of a rower's journey begins when they set hands on a boat. You will carry a boat with others like you, and become astounded at how heavy this thing really is.
When all the oars are in, you may row arms only. Seems easy. then the back is added, then the legs. It seems okay. Only as the weeks go by do you realize the enormity of what you have gotten yourself into.
Your hands will bleed and ache and sting; it hurts to pick up a pencil sometimes. You are introduced to the ergometer, erg, or rowing machine- this machine is the finest example of torture in the modern world. Your hands will hurt worse, you will pull harder, you will vomit in trash cans and wobble on jelly legs to your car.
Finally, the hunger. There is no greater hunger than hunger after practice. You will eat anything and everything in sight.
But aside from the general pain, nausea, and discomfort associated with rowing- it will get you fit. You will meet new people that will change your life. You will work harder than you ever have and see results. You will do things that you have never dreamed of. You will fall in love with crew, only it's a weird kind of love. A certain comfort comes from smelling the boathouse on your clothes, stepping off of the erg and into the rainy outdoors, or crossing the finish line with boats behind you.
Rower: I can't, I have crew.
Non-rower: What's crew?
Rower: Rowing
Non-rower: *kayaking motion* I've been kayaking before!
Rower: I don't think you understand.
Cheerleader: I have practice until 5 today! Ugh!
Rower: *low growl*
Coach: Set up the ergs!
Rowers: I can't I broke my body
Mom: I think I made too much pasta
Rower: there is no such thing as too much pasta
Non-rower: What's crew?
Rower: Rowing
Non-rower: *kayaking motion* I've been kayaking before!
Rower: I don't think you understand.
Cheerleader: I have practice until 5 today! Ugh!
Rower: *low growl*
Coach: Set up the ergs!
Rowers: I can't I broke my body
Mom: I think I made too much pasta
Rower: there is no such thing as too much pasta
by cinderandsmoke October 05, 2012
I can't hook up with you, I have crew
by Tine March 17, 2005