Habeas coitus is the latin phrase for engaging in sexual intercourse. Its usefulness lies in its esoteric nature; one can use this phrase in public, surrounded by old women, or even in church without the people around them realizing what they are talking about.
James: Hey, Bill, guess what?
Bill: What?
James: Suzanne and I habeas coitus last night.
Bill: ... ... ... What the hell are you talking about?
Bill: What?
James: Suzanne and I habeas coitus last night.
Bill: ... ... ... What the hell are you talking about?
by doctorwhy July 17, 2010
Coitus Erectus (Latin: fucker, fuck-person, or motherfucker) is the scientific name for a new kind of homo sapiens sub-species, differentiated by the female having excessive bitchy tendencies, and the male's astonishing ability to nurse the phallus using his own oral cavity (Scientific: to suck one's own dick, to fuck one's self).
The male and female Coitus Erectus often engage in morally-controversial and sexually-deviant behaviors (by homo sapiens standards), which lead to their initial discovery and categorization.
The male and female Coitus Erectus often engage in morally-controversial and sexually-deviant behaviors (by homo sapiens standards), which lead to their initial discovery and categorization.
Having no reason to go out and find a mate, all the males of the Coitus Erectus sub-species died out within a generation.
by neonmafia October 13, 2014
intercourse that is intended to be of a wacky, goofy, or even zany nature. often times it is for a joke, homosexual relations, or just plain silly
John: hey Mike how was that looney coitus you had with Sarah?
Mike: it was great she literally dressed up like a clown and blew my dick like a balloon
*John and Mike high five*
Mike: it was great she literally dressed up like a clown and blew my dick like a balloon
*John and Mike high five*
by bigmanharbor November 24, 2022
to disturb/disrupt two people having sex, thereby stopping them from doing so. Generally with some sort of reason.
"Where did Alex put the keys to the car?"
"I dont know, go ask him."
"i cant, hes banging his gf"
"Guess you'll just have to go Coitus interruptus them"
"I dont know, go ask him."
"i cant, hes banging his gf"
"Guess you'll just have to go Coitus interruptus them"
by _Dan_the_man_ February 9, 2006
The act of engaging in intercourse, to climax or not, with the umbilicus/navel/belly button. It frequently occurs in inexperienced males that are seeking any dark crevice for sexual pleasure while lacking in knowledge of the female anatomy. It can also be intentional, especially when the sexual act involves a partner, male or female, with a significant amount soft tissue is present in the neighboring structures. It is not to be confused with coitus panniculus, engaging in coitus with the folds of abdominal fat.
I was unaware of the female anatomy my first sexual interaction. While searching for home, I engaged in coitus umbilicus as she writhed from pain as her happy trail was mechanically stripped of hair from the friction.
by William Black July 12, 2013
John from Italy love a girl but she don't seems intresting it, may be she has a vacant look or she is not just accessible to him. So thinks he had sex with this girl a few weeks ago, and she was begging for it, but he's never had sex with her before, or after, so for now it's classified as a case of coitus mysterioso. It happened to me with a italian girl last year.
by Ciolabella April 18, 2008
by Super fun happy times November 6, 2009