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Chives

Chives, most people call them green onions, but they're really scallions.
The misuses always fixes a plate of relish with them little carrot sticks. Y'know, olives, pickles, chives...most folks call 'em "green onions" , but they're really scallions. Have you ever noticed that, Joe?

See: Firesign Theater, Stan Freberg -Christmas Dragnet (1953)
by Roxanne Pearls July 23, 2016
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Chives

A sexually transmitted disease. Symptoms include: delelopment of itchy bumps in the genital area, odd smells emiting from genital area, and occasional Phish music eminating from the mouth and genital area. No known cure.
The Dude: Aw man, that sucks that you got Chives? Who gave it to you?
The Man: That Dead Head at the club... she was hawt
by yogan February 2, 2009
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Chives

A creepy butler dude who will hang outside your window. A potential stalker and killer.

*does not have to be a butler. Could also be: unwanted male, cat, murderer, doctor, therapist, etc.
"So Jen, has Chives been around your window lately"
by Squishy The Bunny January 3, 2009
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Chives

Customer: Hi, I noticed on your menu you have the baked potato with chives. What are chives?

Waiter: Oh well, ya know.. its just chives and all that good stuff!

Customer: Why, thank you, very descriptive!!
by The Big Ragooy March 15, 2011
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chives

(noun) Little bits of dried up pussy juice, or chunk embedded in he hairs of a twice baked russet, or simply after a fuck fest.
I was just about to go there, but then I saw the chives and ran.
by Antenna Wilde February 21, 2008
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chives

Cooler word that is a combination of fives and seat check it allows a person to keep their seat for five minutes and if someone is in the seat the chives caller counts to five and the person who doesn't get up gets slapped in the face by everyone until the seat is given back. Invented by Alec.
Bob: Chives!
Bill: sits in Bobs seat

THREE MINUTES LATER

Bob: get out of my seat
Bill: doubt it
Bob: 1 2 3...
Bill: ok, ok you can have your seat back
by pablito386 January 13, 2008
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Chives

Chives is the legendary butler from the SML universe. He hates his life and wants to die. After his debut in the SML video "SML Movie: Joseph The Millionaire!" He has gotten his own puppet, had a cult following, and is now appearing in the recent SML videos.
by SliccXD March 4, 2021
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