a bert

After a bout of anal sex, you provide your sexual partner with a shit uni-brow by slapping your shitcock across their eyebrows

"Honey, would you mind if after our ass-fuck I would bert you?"

by Fudgie October 30, 2003

a bert

After a nice round of anal sex..Provide your sexual partner with a unibrow of nothing but shit...:D

I fucked liz and then gave her a bert,.She looked like bert from Sesme street

by Darling-Beau September 12, 2005

a bert

1. derogatory term used for someone who can't "get any"

might have glasses, wear hockey jerseys all the time, have in-depth conversations with teachers, and may possibly be jewish

You couldnt even get any from that prostitute after you offered $100? You're such a bert.

by Rasheed Scott June 14, 2006

a bert

1. derogatory term used for someone who can't "get any"

might have glasses, wear hockey jerseys all the time, have in-depth conversations with teachers, and may possibly be jewish

You couldnt even get any from that prostitute after you offered $100? You're such a bert.

by Winthrop Paul June 18, 2006

bert bert

term of endearment, friend, homie, homeboy, my dog, pet

hey bert bert come over tonight

by Paul Oliveri September 1, 2008

Bert

the best boy you'll ever meet. he's polite, nice, a true gentleman. his mother raised him right. he's hilarious, sarcastic in a good way, and super caring. he's also cute. he's a gamer and laughs hard at everything. he's perfect inside and out. he plays soccer but always calls it football. he always asks questions because he always wants to get to know people. he's super athletic and has muscles. he's just amazing. if you don't know him, get to know him. you won't regret it.

Guy 1: "Dude, did you see Bert open a door, and start to go down the stairs, but saw that the door closed before this girl could go though and went BACK to open it for her?"
Guy 2: "Yea bro, he's such a gentleman."

by DogsAndDolphins April 5, 2014

Berted

to get completely inebriated on a weekday, knowing you have to work the next day

Feeling rubbish - got absolutely Berted last night, and have a full day of meetings today.

by Neroli119 May 15, 2017