Skip to main content
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

ZooKEEpers 

The 2022 Student Section Leaders of Waukee High school. We may loose the game but our student section was better. The “KEE” in the ZooKEEpers represents the “kee” in Waukee.
The ZooKEEpers went crazy at the football game last night. They had us moshpiting in the student section.
ZooKEEpers by Waukee fan man September 20, 2022

Zookeepers 

Zookeepers are people with low intelligence who usually suffer from Notable examples are people who laugh hysterically at terrible comedies, people who shop for cars "by payment," Millennial women who make Evangelical TikToks, and Gen X women who give out unsolicited and dangerous medical advice on FaceBook. In general, they exhibit the Dunning Kruger effect with their words and actions. They are typically overweight and dress in ironic t-shirts that say things like "Blessed" along with flip-flops. They usually have young children who scream on airplanes and can only be silenced with McDonald's fries. They typically sell MLM products until their friends and family have stopped talking to them. The term is derived from an episode of the popular web series Half in the Bag featuring the movie The Zookeeper. In this episode, the types of people who enjoy terrible cookie-cutter low-brow comedies are described. One example from The Zookeeper is when Kevin James's character takes a man in a gorilla suit and when the gorilla sees the sign, he says, "Shuuuut... uuuuup" and the audience howls with laughter "because they've heard of TGI Friday's." These individuals lack so much awareness of themselves and what they witness that they laugh at product placements.
"How was the new Minions movie last night?"

"It was OK but it was hard to enjoy because the BO and breath of the people around me were intolerable. They also screamed every time they saw a Minion, so they screamed every 10 seconds for 90 minutes straight."

"Well, Minions fans are some of the biggest Zookeepers around. There's not much you can do but avoid them if you have the choice."
Zookeepers by johnnemo March 30, 2024

zookeepers delight 

the act of being double penetrated by two different species of animals, preferably in a zoo
i went to the zoo yesterday with my dog to find a partner to have a zookeepers delight

Cincinnati Zookeeper 

A person who shoots a rare and majestic animal in the face with their spunk after letting someone with an extreme case of diarrhea sit on their face leaving a perfect imprint of a butthole in shit on their neck.
Harambe: Gross! Some dude just shot bucksnot on me!

Kevin James: Yea! I just got you with the Cincinnati Zookeeper! Now give me a hot lunch!!

Zookeeper's Caress 

In order to perform the Zookeeper's caress:
Pack a fat dip (the fatter the better the sensation, ask any caress recipient)
Wheel a broad (hopefully a '92) with the dip in
Visit the southern hemisphere
Use your fat dip lip to diddle her skittle

Zookeeper tips:
-if you pack the dip in your bottom lip you can use it to 69 the 92
-the more grotesque, face deformingly huge the dip you pack is = the manlier you will appear = the classier (and in all likelihood hotter) the broad you will grease
-snus is acceptable; however, since it smells like toothpaste this is like playing on easy mode
-get creative, the entire chaw doesn't have to remain in your mouth through the entirety of the maneuver
aw man last union night Freddy packed a mad dip and performed the zookeeper's caress on some '92 in the girls bathroom
Zookeeper's Caress by a zookeeper September 28, 2010

I could be a zookeeper, but I'm not... 

Phrase said as response when someone says something ridiculously pointless and lame that no one could possibly ever give a shit about.
Man 1: I wish Nickelback would come to Tuscon on their tour!
Man 2: I could be a zookeeper, but I'm not...
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026
Load more