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A wet-face watermelon is a sex act involving Watermelon Pop Rocks, a spatula, industrial strength zip ties, Pioneer Valley Gourmet Cinnamon Apple Passion Syrup, Hello Kitty bandaids, and two pinecones from 1 to 3 inches in diameter. The book containing a description of this act, From Gangbangs to Bungalows: A Comprehensive Encyclopedia of Kinks, Hang-Ups, and Deviations, has been banned in almost every developed country, though rumor has it that this ritual is still a common practice among natives of Micronesia.
Alas, I guess we'll never know just what a wet-face watermelon is.
by Angela Diablo January 26, 2016
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