Tudhail is a mythopoetic figure in South
Asian folklore.
The Tudhail myth has its origins in the Tatti wars fought subsequent to the arrival of the Aryan peoples into the sub-continent.
The destruction of the well-planned drainage systems of the Harrappan people by the invading Aryans caused mountainloads of shit everywhere.
Literally. Therefore, the story goes that the gods created a super-being from their own faeces and endowed it with powers to clean up the mess.
However, once the shit was gone, the Tudhail could not be controlled and she still roams the
earth stealing the shitting powers of people, depriving them of the very thing that makes us all
human, the ability to shit.
In the 20th century, a counter myth called the anti-Tudail came into vogue, when a prophecy was made in
1984 that a hyperconstipated child would be born that would stand up to the tyranny of the Tudail and put an end to her menace, ushering an era of peace where people can shit freely irrespective of their race, caste, or
creed.
Some faithful have it that the anti-Tudail has left the region of South Asia and is hiding somewhere in the Pacific tropics. The costs of
toilet paper in the region have subsequently doubled.
