touched cloth

derived from 'about to shit oneself
Touched cloth means to have almost died.

my brother Ned has overcome colon cancer, he really 'touched cloth'

by slash4 August 9, 2020

Touched cloth

To Have your shit touch your pants.

Ryan: Oh dear Josh, I have shat myself and I think that the poo has stained my lovely new y-fronts from M&S.

Josh: You mean you have touched cloth?

Ryan: Yes I shouldn't eat shit from public toilets.

by Josh_S September 16, 2008

Touched Cloth

To Touch Cloth is to have one's poo-poo touch your underpants and leave a stain. It it's slightly more high brow than just to say "UGH I shat my boxers blud."

Ryan: Oh No I can feel my poo touching my lovely new y-front for the charity bin.

Josh: My word man you've touched cloth.

Ryan: *slaps Face* oh my god

by Josh_S September 10, 2006

mud touched the cloth

AKA "mud touched the cotton"

When you soil your underpants due to an unexpected shart.
Please note that this is the extreme case of a shart in which the fecal matter explodes beyond the crevice of your butt crack and makes contact with your undergarments.

Harold pushed his fart out so hard that the mud touched the cloth. His wife regrets making the bean burritos.

by Mr. Terrible April 29, 2008

cloth toucher

1.when a piece of poo has protruded far enough from your rectum to touch your under-clothing.

I used my underpants to wipe the results of a cloth toucher out of my anus. I threw them in the women's bathroom.

by scannin October 10, 2006