Yo, Ronnie came home so tomped last night. While he cooked sausages and spaghetti in the microwave, he told me 18 times how he is going to open his own bar, how he is too good for these sloots, and then proceeded to pass out after telling racist jokes.

-"Hey, hey, hey so this guy who has never talked to me in the past year, and unfriended me on facebook months ago, comes up to me to shake my hand, and i'm like who are you. I don't know you, we are not cool. I almost fought him, bro. Who does he think he is?" -"Go to bed. You're tomped."

phone: why don’t you go to sleep tommy it’s 2 in the morning?
tommy:why don’t you die you dumbazz