Proposed by historians Sir Keeler Gonzales, Empress Mai Ton, and Archduke Sai Sriram in the early 21st century, on the campus of William Marsh Rice University, the law of conservation of grind states that the grind never stops but merely takes different forms. Grind takes three principle forms, potential grind, kinetic grind, and party grind ("grinding" grind as it is known outside of the intellectual community). Potential grind is given by the expression Mass x hours of sleep x g (the grind constant). g=69 grinds/sec^2. Kinetic grind is given by the expression (1/2)Pp^2. P=panic constant p= procrastination factor. Party grind is the inverse of kinetic grind, but can increase exponentially as given by dA/dt (alcohol over time). This Law has been widely accepted in the scientific and educational communities.
Person A: I need to rest, I've been working too hard today.
Person B: But A, I thought the grind never stops??
Person A: According to the law of conservation of grind, I am merely converting my kinetic grind into potential grind.
by President David Leebron December 8, 2017
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