Stevens Goggles
Similar to beer goggles, Stevens Goggles involves drinking copious amounts of liquor or beer until females (who are normally about a 3 out of 10) become unusually attractive (about a 7 out of 10). This name is derived from the technological institute of higher learning in Hoboken, NJ, at which a very small percentage of the student body is female (~25%). Of those females, only a small percentage are attractive (~5%). Unlike beer goggles, the amounts of liquor required to make Stevens females look reasonably decent is several orders of magnitude greater than the amount required to kill a herd of cattle.
-OMFG we're going to chug everclear, let's toast: STEVENS GOGGLES FOR EVERYBODY!!!!!!
-Recently, a group of Stevens females was seen running from a very drunk man with a harpoon gun claiming to be Captain Ahab. Later in the evening, a group of males was seen trying to have sex with the same girls; they appeared to all be suffering from a case of Stevens Goggles. The next day, three men were found drowning in their own vomit on the sidewalk outside of the dormitory.
-Recently, a group of Stevens females was seen running from a very drunk man with a harpoon gun claiming to be Captain Ahab. Later in the evening, a group of males was seen trying to have sex with the same girls; they appeared to all be suffering from a case of Stevens Goggles. The next day, three men were found drowning in their own vomit on the sidewalk outside of the dormitory.
Stevens Goggles by excelsiorjss November 26, 2007
