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Splitting 

Splooge + Shitting = Splitting

When you jerk off on the toilet and simultaneously push out a shit as you finish, resulting in a larger load of jizz.
I caught Elliot splitting in my bathroom when he said he just had a stomach ache.
A totally normal cultural behavior called *hyperbole*, that “mental health professionals” pathologize.
It’s a classical example of cultural/social unawareness or dissonance in modern psychiatry/“mental healthcare.”
“Dude that ice cream we had the other day was the BEST EVER!!!!”
“Dude that ice cream we had from that other shop was literally the WORST, it tasted like DOG SH**”

Psychiatrist: “yeah that’s splitting, I think that’s bipolar.”
Friend: “you sure that’s not just his personality doc?”
Splitting by in plain sight April 14, 2026

splitting wigs 

To crack a muthafucka's head wide open.
If shit don't change around here, I'm gonna start splitting wigs up in this bitch!!

Splitting Cannons 

Splitting Cannons: The occurrence in which an object, ie: shoulder strap, guitar strap, seat belt etc. segregates two excessively large mammary glands. Size would constitute 36 D and above
Man did you see the chick in that convertible? Her seatbelt was splitting cannons....
Splitting Cannons by Mr.Cannon January 15, 2011

Splitting Logs 

The process by which one sharts themself while wearing a thong, thus "splitting" the feces in half.
The girl had to leave the party early due to "splitting logs" in her pants.

splitting hairs 

To argue about an inconsequential and trivial aspect of an issue
When you are accused of being forty-five minutes late for an appointment, you are splitting hairs to say that you were really only forty minutes late
splitting hairs by Rafael Nunes February 5, 2006