Forms of media, especially YouTube videos or clickbait articles, that you know will not be pornographic but still somehow expect (and hope) to be pornographic, and then click on and/or watch, only to be disappointed and still horny.
Bro 1: Hey man, did you hear about that Buzzfeed video "Girls Use Vibrators For The First Time"?
Bro 2: Shit man, nah I didn't, I'll go check it out, I'm sure it's hot
ONE WEEK LATER
Bro 2: Brooo, they just went to the toy shop, bought vibrators, and then cut to the girls talking about using them afterward, and it wasn't sexy at all! That was some serious pretend porn.
Bro 1: Damn, you're right. Fuck pretend porn.
Bro 2: Shit man, nah I didn't, I'll go check it out, I'm sure it's hot
ONE WEEK LATER
Bro 2: Brooo, they just went to the toy shop, bought vibrators, and then cut to the girls talking about using them afterward, and it wasn't sexy at all! That was some serious pretend porn.
Bro 1: Damn, you're right. Fuck pretend porn.
by Loberson June 2, 2016
Definition A;
A character from the Beano comic who pretends to be something every issue and dresses up like it, beginning with a martian in his debut.
Definition B,
Pretentious lesbian, some bitter girl who got screwed around by some asshole so she decides that she hates all men and refuses to date another, so she announces thats shes moving onto dating girls, even though shes not actually a true lesbian.
A character from the Beano comic who pretends to be something every issue and dresses up like it, beginning with a martian in his debut.
Definition B,
Pretentious lesbian, some bitter girl who got screwed around by some asshole so she decides that she hates all men and refuses to date another, so she announces thats shes moving onto dating girls, even though shes not actually a true lesbian.
Example A;
'That Les Pretend is such a copying bastard'
Example B;
'wah wah, I hate all men, I'm gonna go date girls now'
'pfft, yeah thats right, tar all men with the same brush, friggin Les Pretend'
'That Les Pretend is such a copying bastard'
Example B;
'wah wah, I hate all men, I'm gonna go date girls now'
'pfft, yeah thats right, tar all men with the same brush, friggin Les Pretend'
by Llihp Notwen April 15, 2013
Pretending Perfection is an album written by West Virginia's one and only, Huey Mack. Huey Mack's Pretending Perfection has 12 songs on it, and is available on iTunes. Huey shows many different emotions in this song, as such as mentioning about how good things can happen if you be simple, and keep things straight. He made a whole entire song about his mom, and named it Charlotte, and how his mom supported his rapping career when he dropped out of school, and her single mom life when her husband Rick left her. He raps out about parting and how he has women always loving and partying with him. He made a song named "Real Me" and explains that just because he's a rapper, who has lovers and haters, he still lives a normal life with normal people. This album reached number 8 on billboard, a huge accomplishment. This is an album worth having. I respect Huey Mack more then you could imagine.
by ldlamppa December 9, 2013
The act of googling something previously unknown or not yet understood & acting as if one knew all along.
Sally texts: "Banana peppers are amazing"
Joe Googles "Banana peppers"
Joe texts: "Yes I love them also :)" <-- Google Pretend
Joe Googles "Banana peppers"
Joe texts: "Yes I love them also :)" <-- Google Pretend
by siforek February 27, 2012
Pretend Shoes=Pretentious
Phrase coined as an underhanded insult directed to the obnoxious and smarmy masses that one may encounter. Phrase coined by Los Angeles-based artist PROPER RISK.
Definition:
pre⋅ten⋅tious: adj.
1. Claiming or demanding a position of distinction or merit, especially when unjustified. <The pretentious fraud is he who assumes a love of culture that is alien to him — Richard Watts>
2. Ostentatious. See Synonyms:
Phrase coined as an underhanded insult directed to the obnoxious and smarmy masses that one may encounter. Phrase coined by Los Angeles-based artist PROPER RISK.
Definition:
pre⋅ten⋅tious: adj.
1. Claiming or demanding a position of distinction or merit, especially when unjustified. <The pretentious fraud is he who assumes a love of culture that is alien to him — Richard Watts>
2. Ostentatious. See Synonyms:
Examples:
1. Whoa... this dude totally lost any of my attention when he started being a pretend shoes ass, prick...
2. This fool is totally keepin his pretend shoes shiny tonite... pssh.
3. Dontcha think your dead serious dissertation on why your poetry blog is the cure to depression might come off a little pretend shoes?... really?... not even just a lil?
1. Whoa... this dude totally lost any of my attention when he started being a pretend shoes ass, prick...
2. This fool is totally keepin his pretend shoes shiny tonite... pssh.
3. Dontcha think your dead serious dissertation on why your poetry blog is the cure to depression might come off a little pretend shoes?... really?... not even just a lil?
by thatbastard December 2, 2009
pretending to be a lesbian for attention in order to attract straight men who are aroused by girl-on-girl action
by felix9898 May 14, 2010
He doesn't live here, he's a pretend-sident.
by Smartycat May 16, 2017