Matt Bauer

Brother of the popular character Jack Bauer from the series 24. Assumed dead, Matt Bauer is an assasin working for "Chapter", a U.S. "black-ops" program. Matt Bauer has killed 140 men, and he enjoyed every single kill. Matt prides himself on killing his targets in varying creative ways such as: using a pizza cutter to slash victims throat, focing subject to consume an entire bottle of Dave's Insanity Hot Sauce.

Unlike Jack Bauer's classic line" Damn, there's no time!",
Matt also has a signature line:"Damn, I'm hungry."

Agent A - Sir, Matt Bauer just killed 10 innocent people inside a McDonalds because they forgot to put ketchup in his bag.

Agent B - No ketchup? Those bastards!!!

Matt Bauer by Mr. Asshole August 24, 2006

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Dirty Mattbauer

When a girl is about to cum from oral, she pulls your face into her pooper while not allowing you to leave until you solve an entire calculus exam

He didn’t know how to use his tongue, and it took me an hour to cum. To get back at him, I gave him a Dirty Mattbauer when I finished

Dirty Mattbauer by Covidconcussion April 16, 2020

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Related Words

Matt Bauer • Dirty Mattbauer • matt • Matt Damon • Matt Walsh • Matt Smith • matt rose • matt lauer • matt stone • Matt Sturniolo

Nutshot

It is said of the situation where a person has the bad luck to make contact with his testicles against an undefined surface or object, intentioned or not.
Given the nature of the word, it is more appropriate to design cases where the interaction is made with a moving object, for example, a ball.
Although it is extremely painful for the victim, it tends to be considerably funny to people who witness it.

Today in the baseball game the pitcher took a nutshot; the baseball hit him in the nuts.

Man, I just watched the funniest nutshot video ever.

Nutshot by Uberflaven March 1, 2009

Word of the Day on June 26, 2026

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Nerd neck

A "human" that spends so much time playing video games that their posture is level nerd neck. Everytime anyone goes tryhard they hunch down and their neck gets longer there fore a nerd neck is always hunched down cause they're always going try hard. In other words a nerd neck is a try hard, since their neck is 100% longer than the average human being due to playing too many video games and taking them serious, nerd necks are not even considered human anymore but something more sad. Nerd necks are often found on fortnite, their natural habitat usually being tilted towers.

What a fucking nerd neck!

He is building so fast, nerd neck!

Looser more like a nerd neck ha!

Nerd neck by D Sandwich Maker February 5, 2019

Word of the Day on June 25, 2026

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love peace and chicken grease

"another of sayin peace out or good bye"

Talk to ya later......Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease

love peace and chicken grease by Adronna July 19, 2003

Word of the Day on June 24, 2026

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prickup

slip of the tongue perhaps,
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable

A:*gah*
B: "Whats the matter"
A: This dam prickup is blinding me.
B: Stupid thing's, as if there lights weren't blinding enough as it is.

prickup by lunasea September 28, 2009

Word of the Day on June 23, 2026

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Serial Monogamist

Someone who jumps from one relationship immediately into another one.

Serial monogamists can not stand to be alone and often suffer from vast commitment and insecurity issues.

Because they jump into relationships immediately after the previous one has ended, serial monogamists typically don't take the time to reflect on their behavior or why their previous relationships failed; thus, they end up making the same relationship mistakes over and over again.

Person 1: Damn, Dustin already has a new girlfriend?! It's only been two weeks since he broke up with his fiance! I think he's a sociopath.

Person 2: No, he's a serial monogamist...

Serial Monogamist by Goody2Shuze March 6, 2016

Word of the Day on June 22, 2026

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