Matt Bauer

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Brother of the popular character Jack Bauer from the series 24. Assumed dead, Matt Bauer is an assasin working for "Chapter", a U.S. "black-ops" program. Matt Bauer has killed 140 men, and he enjoyed every single kill. Matt prides himself on killing his targets in varying creative ways such as: using a pizza cutter to slash victims throat, focing subject to consume an entire bottle of Dave's Insanity Hot Sauce.

Unlike Jack Bauer's classic line" Damn, there's no time!",
Matt also has a signature line:"Damn, I'm hungry."

Agent A - Sir, Matt Bauer just killed 10 innocent people inside a McDonalds because they forgot to put ketchup in his bag.

Agent B - No ketchup? Those bastards!!!

Matt Bauer by Mr. Asshole August 24, 2006

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Dirty Mattbauer

When a girl is about to cum from oral, she pulls your face into her pooper while not allowing you to leave until you solve an entire calculus exam

He didn’t know how to use his tongue, and it took me an hour to cum. To get back at him, I gave him a Dirty Mattbauer when I finished

Dirty Mattbauer by Covidconcussion April 16, 2020

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Related Words

Matt Bauer • Dirty Mattbauer • matt lauer • Matt Lauer Button • matt lauer'd • Matt Lauered • matt • Matt Damon • Matt Walsh • Matt Smith

Slop Grenade

When someone uses AI to generate a large document, slide deck, or piece of code/software and tosses it over the fence for you to deal with.

Chad: Hey Brent I sent you the new backend API change to review, it’s only 100 files changed.

Brent: he just tossed me a slop grenade

Slop Grenade by Joe Squid September 28, 2026

Word of the Day on September 29, 2026

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floxi

Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).

After we broke up, he was floxi to me.

floxi by Dr. Geek May 13, 2009

Word of the Day on September 28, 2026

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leafers

NYC people who migrate north to Quahog, RI to see the leaves in the fall.

New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.

leafers by ss++ February 8, 2005

Word of the Day on September 27, 2026

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Respectfully

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.

Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.

Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020

Word of the Day on September 26, 2026

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You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.

Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life by Sus Chad September 21, 2026

Word of the Day on September 25, 2026

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crunchy

Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.

"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"

crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007

Word of the Day on September 24, 2026

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