Skip to main content

Matt Bauer

Brother of the popular character Jack Bauer from the series 24. Assumed dead, Matt Bauer is an assasin working for "Chapter", a U.S. "black-ops" program. Matt Bauer has killed 140 men, and he enjoyed every single kill. Matt prides himself on killing his targets in varying creative ways such as: using a pizza cutter to slash victims throat, focing subject to consume an entire bottle of Dave's Insanity Hot Sauce.

Unlike Jack Bauer's classic line" Damn, there's no time!",
Matt also has a signature line:"Damn, I'm hungry."
Agent A - Sir, Matt Bauer just killed 10 innocent people inside a McDonalds because they forgot to put ketchup in his bag.

Agent B - No ketchup? Those bastards!!!
by Mr. Asshole August 24, 2006
mugGet the Matt Bauer mug.

Dirty Mattbauer

When a girl is about to cum from oral, she pulls your face into her pooper while not allowing you to leave until you solve an entire calculus exam
He didn’t know how to use his tongue, and it took me an hour to cum. To get back at him, I gave him a Dirty Mattbauer when I finished
by Covidconcussion April 16, 2020
mugGet the Dirty Mattbauer mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email