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To take oneself out when one has no date
I couldn't find anyone to go out with me, so I decided to masturdate. I took myself out for dinner and a movie.
by MicklePickle January 04, 2015
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A term that was first coined on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Masturdate is an intentional pun of masturbate. In this lewd yet satisfying activity, one will engage on an ordinary date with his/herself and with the objective to impress and please only themself. Usually, a successful masturdate is followed by myriad hours of masturbation.
Canada's Stop At Third Abstinence Program condones that more teenagers should embrace the pleasures of a masturdate without shame and with an intact dignity.
by shazzantbot January 11, 2006
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To stay at home and Masturbate instead of going out and doing anything else. It's a date, that rarely ends bad.
Joe: "Hey man wanna go to the game this Saturday?"

Brian: "Sorry man I can't, I got a Masturdate on Saturday."

Joe: "Oh..."

Brian: "Yeah..."
by ai-KILLER-md November 08, 2006
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Doing things that one would normally do as a couple. Such as seeing a movie or eating out. Usually happens after a breakup.
Campbell couldn't get a date so he decided to masturdate and went to a movie.
by Mercur0 January 06, 2011
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Refers to the time frame in a long term relationship; most often after cohabitation has lasted over the one to two year mark, in which one or both parties begins to masturbate more than having sexual intercourse.
Peter: Maybe she’s just stressed out.

Mike: She says she’s too tired to have sex, but I found a ton of porn in her browser. Maybe I should masturdate too.
by Jizzandhers June 25, 2018
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Masturbating before a date so you don't think about sex the whole date. As seen in "There's Something About Mary."
Jim: Dude, are you ready for this double date with Crystal and Lisa?

Jack: Yeah. Just let me masturdate first. Lisa's so hot, I don't want to ruin this!
by Vinchenzonaughti March 03, 2008
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Going on a date with someone you know is going to give you a handjob, and you'll gladly give them one too.
"Yeah, I'm totally masturdating the guy from History."
"I'm going to the movies with her, it's totally going to be a masturdate."
by punksucks July 09, 2016
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