I’m-ana 

Combining the words “I’m going to” in such a manner that it becomes shorter and faster to say.

I’m-ana play some golf this afteroon, would you line to join me?

I’m-ana by cc9 April 20, 2018

I'm so anal 

When you imposter sus

Omg my mom said I couldn't go outside, uhh I'm so anal

I'm so anal by Ethan Roop February 12, 2021

At least I'm not into anal sex 

A statement of truth which asserts that nothing (vis-à-vis kinks & fetishes) is objectively weirder or repulsive than anal sex.

Imogen: You like to fuck the windshield screen of your car??? That's fking weird bro...
Sans: Chillll girl, at least I'm not into anal sex!

At least I'm not into anal sex by Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian November 27, 2021

The bare minimum I can manage 

I started by cleaning up the clutter. Then, I cleaned out and unclogged the sink. Next, I bleached the kitchen and clean the stove. I replaced my dinky plastic bookshelf with the real wooden bookshelf I got a while ago. I swept the carpet (because it was took late to vacuum). Organized my random shit I had laying around (cords, cologne, etc.). Then I cleaned the bathroom. If I didn’t have to sleep to go work 2 jobs I would have bleached the walls and vents. What’s the cripple doing? Being waited on, hand and foot, and having women brought to him to suck his dick?

Hym “Because the bare minimum I can manage is the maximum amount that is possible in a given amount of time. Now what happens? Does the retard’s impaled corpse appear outside my window when I wake up? No? Does someone explain to me how Dr. Bus is quoting the things I said to a guy the day after I say them? No? Are all of my problems external and not a reflection of my inability or behavior? Yes. And now I’m allowed to criticize you all.”

The bare minimum I can manage by Hym Iam October 18, 2022

I am the manager 

What you say to customers, who have nothing better to do than complain and blame you for their life problems, when they believe that you are the bane of their existence ( usually via coupons expiring, websites being faulty or the weather being dangerous), but it is your job to not only deal with said problems, but also show that you know exactly what you are doing. All while not telling them that they are idiots and/or that they need to learn common sense or manners.

Customer: why won't you deliver to me?
Me: there's ice on the roads, a major accident, Nuclear fallout and you're out of our area
Customer: I need to speak to a manager
Me:*turns 360 degrees* I am the manager

I am the manager by Why am I still at marcos? February 13, 2019

i, evax humbly submit a toast to nicholas alexander for successfully managing to pirate warcraft iii so he may play defense of the ancients. congratulations, nick. enjoy your dota. 

CONSUME THE CUM CHALICE

I, EvaX humbly submit a toast to Nicholas Alexander for successfully managing to pirate WarCraft III so he may play defense of the ancients. Congratulations, Nick. Enjoy your dota.

i, evax humbly submit a toast to nicholas alexander for successfully managing to pirate warcraft iii so he may play defense of the ancients. congratulations, nick. enjoy your dota. by Siriusexclu October 27, 2020

I want to speak to the manager 

Karen says this every time somebody gets an order 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of an order wrong

Karen: I want to speak to the manager
Employer: oh shit
Manager: oh shit
CEO: oh shit
President of the USA: oh shit
UN: oh shit
Lizard guys: oh shit
Every sentient being in the universe: oh shit

I want to speak to the manager by &qwertyuiop& October 27, 2019