Maury Hancock

Maury is head of the Theatre Department and of the Honor Council at St. Catherine's School. He is well known for his mad directing and technical skills, uninhibited conversation, house in France, and messy office. Maury is one of few faculty members at St. Catherine's who actually possess intelligence and common sense. He affectionately refers to his wife as "La Princesse" and is a devoted pirate. Can be found at McVey theatre when his schedule permits, or brooding on the grounds with his Hagrid-like coat and wide-brimmed hat. Favorite earrings include a scull and crossbones and a bicycle chain link. He enjoys crossword puzzles, gourmet coffees and teas, esoteric movies, and his futuristic, computer-like cell phone. One can spot him by his unusual laughter.
Favorite phrases: "You're fired!" and <Insert nickname of the month here>, which include:
bumblebee
hummingbird
angel of the morning
sunshine
BAAAAAAAAZAAAAAAAAKAAAAAAAAAS!
The Ozzie
The Wankers
Nicola
etc...

Often accompanied by Todd the Child Molester or Bob the Genderless One.

Techie 1: How do we do this? I'm so confused.
Techie 2: Ask Maury, he'll know.
Techie 1: Yeah, but we still won't.

Actor 1: Should I move there?
Maury: Well, what do you think?

Boarder 1: So my curfew's twelve, right?
Maury: No.
Boarder 1: What if I had parent permission? Just for tonight?
Maury: How about your parents call the police, and have them call me. Then you can stay out til twelve.

Day Student 1: Have you seen Maury?
Day Student 2: Yeah, he's so creepy!

by Miriam and BAAAAAZZZ! January 23, 2005

John Hancock

(n.) American shipping magnate and possible smuggler who became famous for his role in the American Revolution. He served as President of the Second Continental Congress, was famously a signatory to the Declaration of Independence, and later became the first post colonial governor of Massachusetts. In addition to these accomplishments, Hancock was a prolific author on the subject of masturbation. He wrote several authoritative treatises on the matter (several of which were banned on the orders of George Washington), and famously challenged the widely-held opinion of his fellow Founding Father, Dr. Benjamin Rush, that masturbation caused blindness and hairy palms.

John Hancock was one of America's most illustrious founding fathers and early sex educators.

by Dylan *@*@DaShizz@*@* July 30, 2009

Hancock

Nothing like the Will Smith movie Hancock

Instead a word for a very irritating horny young man who thinks with his penis.

Likes to assume that all girls are chasing after him, when they are running away from him.

Likes to think he is rather important, you hate to say he isn't.

Ugh I really dislike that boy, all he thinks about is himself.

I know, what a hancock.

Haha get this, that boy just said 'it's okay, i know how you feel and i don't mind a quickie'

Oh dear, hancock!

by Hancock Witness December 15, 2009

John Hancock

One's singnature(John Hancock was the first to sign the Declaration of Independence.)

All checks must have your John Hancock to prove that you wrote them.

by Light Joker May 22, 2005

Herbie Hancock

One of the best jazz pianists of our time. Writer of such famous tunes as Chameleon, Maiden Voyage, Eye of the Hurricaine, Palm Grease and Watermelon Man. Innovator in the fusion genre and writer of many really badass funk grooves.

Herbie Hancock is so badass he can turn shit into gold.

by Tobey March 20, 2004

Herbie Hancock

The answer Tommy Boy leaves on his test in the movie Tommy Boy.

John Hankcock, ha, its Herbie Hankcock.

by Zoolander July 18, 2005

John Hancocked

To be "John Handcocked" is to have a man ejaculate into his hand - and with the semen still pooled in his hand - slap an individual across the face. The name derives from the man's proverbial "ink" which spouts from his "pen." He then claims what is rightfully his by marking his territory.

This is most appropriate at Ugly Sweater Christmas Parties, or when a prostitute gets out of line. Especially applicable to any girls that may own a California Tan boutique and hail from Appalachia.

Kristen: "Oh my god, you'll never believe what Paul did last night!"

Sarah: "What?"

Kristen: "He nutted in his hand and slapped me across the face with it!"

Sarah: "Oh fuck, Nathan has John Hancocked me all the time, it's not a big deal, he's just claiming what is his."

by Ugly Sweater December 11, 2010