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Handcocked

Damn, that dude just took your own pistol and Handcocked you.
by RE1776 July 9, 2022
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John Handcocked

Using the term "John Handcocked" is a biblical allusion to the time when John Handcock was the first bigdickmotherfucker to sign the Declaration of Independence. Using his large weinor, he scribbled his large signature on the document with his dick juice; he also served as a leader during the American Revolution.
I just John Handcocked the fuck out of this discussion board. Our discussion post was supposed to have 3 images
but for some reason mine are like 10 times bigger than everyone else's.

they will know my name.

- Denrari "Rari" K.
by Fentjamin Master February 9, 2025
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Hancocked

When you are beating the Louisville Cardinals in basketball and things seem to be going well and then Luke Hancock comes off the bench, drops 20 on you and you lose.
Witchita State and the Michigan Wolverines got Hancocked in the NCAA tournament.
by BigFanUofL April 17, 2013
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John Hancocked

To be "John Handcocked" is to have a man ejaculate into his hand - and with the semen still pooled in his hand - slap an individual across the face. The name derives from the man's proverbial "ink" which spouts from his "pen." He then claims what is rightfully his by marking his territory.

This is most appropriate at Ugly Sweater Christmas Parties, or when a prostitute gets out of line. Especially applicable to any girls that may own a California Tan boutique and hail from Appalachia.
Kristen: "Oh my god, you'll never believe what Paul did last night!"

Sarah: "What?"

Kristen: "He nutted in his hand and slapped me across the face with it!"

Sarah: "Oh fuck, Nathan has John Hancocked me all the time, it's not a big deal, he's just claiming what is his."
by Ugly Sweater December 12, 2010
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john handcock

A man who frequents prostitutes (John), but materbates on, or is masterbated by (handcock) the prostitute, rather than having sex with her, as a means of avoiding STDs.
YOU: Hey, John, do you wanna go to the bar?

YOUR BUDDY: No, I'm going to see Sharin' Cocks, that ho down the road.

YOU: Aren't you afraid of AIDS?

YOUR BUDDY: No, I'm a John Handcock.
by Sex Ed December 8, 2006
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Handcock

When a woman who is known to suck cock is going in for a kiss the man shoves her face out of the way to avoid cock mouth.
Angie came in for the kiss I handcocked her face away.
by M&M0811 October 14, 2016
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Rusty handcock

When you are fucking a girl in the ass and she begins to shit on your dick. You pull out your shit dick and jerk off using her shit as lube. You then jam it in her front door near the end and give her a good old mixture of pleasure and regret.
We were having a good time until he gave me a rusty handcock. Now I have a UTI.
by Dirty Fish Facts November 6, 2020
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