Elk river is a town in minnesota that likes to rape black highschool football players. their preferred method is to use a broom stick located in the rectum. they are horrible at sports and im sure this interesting ritual plays an important role.
BOB: did you hear why elk river cant play football this year?
Elk River High School is probably one of the worst places ever. If you call some one a name here they will go vape and cut themselves in the bathroom like the emo fuck they are. If a thots ass is hanging out you get your shit clapped for pointing it out. Literally everyone that goes here has an iq of 2.5
An Elk River Dollhouse describes the action of jerking off under your sister's bed while hiding from the police at an under aged drinking event at your dad's house.