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Chuck Norris And Friends 

What the original title of the Bible was.

*ring ring*

This one guy-"Hello? Praise the Chuck."

That guy-"Dude let's go hang out come on! Go & you know..."

This one guy-"I'm really sorry man I can't, I just finished reading Chuck Norris And Friends & now I have to go worship Chuck Norris forever so he won't round-house kick me to the fiery pits of hell for all of eternity!!"

That guy-"...yaa......"

*hang-up*
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Chuck Norris and Friends 

(n)Pronoun/formal/ An elite task force, a badass force, originating in the early 1970's.





The Original members, Chuck Norris, Clint Eastwood, John Wayne and The Trunk Monkey. In 1975, a man, partially intoxicated, claimed that nobody on earth could kick his ass after many victories in bar fights. This group caught word of this man, and planted the Trunk Monkey, at night with a crwbar and mag-lite in hand, in the trunk of his car. On the man's early morning commute, the Trunk Monkey, careful not to kill the man, chooses the mag-lite to hit the man in the back of the head, knocking him unconscious. The Trunk Monkey then, drags the man to his house where the rest of the group waits. When the man wakes up, he is punched five times in the face by each man, and being finished off by A Chuck Norris Signature roundhouse kick to the face which kills him instantly. Needless to say they were burying him the next day. DON'T FUCK WITH C.N.A.F.
Dumb teen #1: "When I grow up, I wanna be part of Chuck Norris and Friends"

Smart teen #1:"LOL! Jesus your stupid"
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