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a chav is a person who is a complete twat and goes around terrorising people. the girls wear/look like : trackies, usually pregnant, soon to be pregnant, or already has a child/children. they wear tacky gold necklaces of a clown or doll. either that or "MASSIV" gold chains. the hands of a chavette are usually heavily adourned with gold rings or soverings which are absolute bollocks. the shoes chavettes like to wear are K Swiss, Lacoste, Fred Perry or some other bag of wank bollocks. The jackets they wear are either Berghaus, Helly Hansen or some other "designer" make. their faces are caked in make up to hide the uglyness and the hair is heavily straightened with the hottest straighteners you can get. possibly GHDs. the girls always accuse perfectly normal, cool people, such as grebs or emos, of "givin them evils". i get several people at school saying to me, "what u lookin at" or my personal favourite, "why wer u givin me evils in PE." OH MY FUCKNIG GOD. there is no rest. the boys wear trackies, thick woolly socks which their trackies are tucked into. they wear the same shoes and coats as the girls. also reebok, and adidas, nike and other sports shoes are worn. the boys will usually ask out girls who are lovely people, but not quite "a fit bird". i have had people ask me out before and it is so fake. it's pretty obvious these people have nothing better to do. the boys will leer at girls and call people such as emos, or alternatives, "slags". i am still trying to figure out why. the hangouts of these fucktards are mcdonalds, parks where they get adults or their older "rock hard" siblings to buy them some cheap cider which is consumed here. or bus shelters, street corners, long busy roads at night time. *trust me, i hate walking down my road in the evening*. urm i don't really know what else to say apart from they will spit on/at you if they see you on the street. and have no education. no decent family. will leave school with no or extremely poor GCSEs. wont/dont go to college/university. if they have a job it should be cleaning up horse muck. oh sweet, sweet revenge. chavs ARE the muck and constantly think about sex. they always want girls to get their tits/minge out on webcam and will shove you if they see you at school. they use the word "grog" which means, "to spit" and will pea shoot at you. if you do not know what pea shoot means, it is when a tube of some sort, usually what pens come in, have a piece of chewed up paper which has actually been in the chav's trampy, groggy, fillingd'up mouth. they spit the piece of paper at you. it CAN stick in your arm and this is extremely tramp. also beware, if you are in class, they may throw pieces of rubber/eraser at you. AVOID THESE WANKERS AT ALL COSTS. they terrorise the innocent, take drugs, get "E'd up" at weekends . the most common things chavs say are,
"what the fuck u lookin at"
"shes a right bird. look at them tits. ad easy shag that."
"ner marrt. she wudnt go anywer ner ya. ur way out 'er league"
"am i bollox"
"u go' a light?"
"save us 2's"
"save us 3's"
"can i shag ya"
"a shagged ya mam"
"ma mam is a rite slag"
"do u get E'd up at the weekend then"
"fuckin sweaty grebo" *SOOO ORIGINAL...*
"stupid emo go sit in a corner and slit ur wrists" *ORIGINAL AS FUCK....*
"ur a fuckin ugly RAT" *note the emphasis on rat*
well that's about it. oh and tons of chavs live on the nunny. shithole of grimsby (n)
chavs wear trackies, tacky jewellery and nick bikes from kids back yards.
by Tashxorz April 05, 2008
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43
Filth hanging outside McDonalds in large groups attempting to look remotely intimidating.
by Kiwie August 04, 2005
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44
These are invisilicant who usually stay in herds or flocks for protection. They also have very limited vocabulary that usually consists of 'fuckin cmon then, got any fags, init, phat, burbury, smash your face in, bling bling,fuck you, hate goths, hate emos, hate skaters, and hate chavs.
Chavs are all invislicants and ignoramouses.
by jamezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz December 15, 2005
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45
A Guy who is 4-5 feet high and thinks he'se the biggest hardest guy in the world Becoz he Smokes Weed and Wearz Burbury
Chav : Ya Been To Mac Donalds?
Chav2: Its Safe
Chav3: Init
Chav4: Seen my New Burbury?
A chav Convo
by Fuckhabbo April 24, 2005
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47
A bunch of white kids who think they are hardcore gangsters from the ghettos and listen to "phat beats" such as Blazin' Squad and So Solid Crew, which they think is gangster music, when it is no more than pop music with annoying "raps" and "beats". They are usually popular at school and go around acting "propa hard" beating up and pushing around anyone that's not popular or a chav like them. They also like to call anyone that likes rock music a "goff" "mosha" or "grunga". Avoid these mindless fuckwits at any chance you can.

See wigger
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by Blahb May 03, 2005
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48
The chav is much like a wild beast. The chav is commonly found in packs hunting on the open plains of the council estate. Their main source of food is found at the local McDonalds, where a Big Mac and fries will see them tamed for over 20 minutes.

The chav's delicacy is known as Vegrandis Parvulus or Small Child.

Aproaching a chav is thought to be very dangerous, especially of you are under the age of 12 and/or a lone female.

Chavs are also responsible for the crime ratings increase that their country of origin has seen over the last 5 years. Unfortunatly, chavs are seen as the cancer of the United Kingdom and as such, many professionals have been searching for a cure. As of yet, all known cures are still illegal.

The chav is also known to posess many magical powers. A chav can afford to own a car and modify it to the extreme (maxing), whilst still being on the dole. The chavs powers also extend to their ability to 'Get away with murder' in a court of law. Law abiding, tax-paying citzens should stay clear of any legal conflicts when it comes to chavs, as they will undoubtably be found to be at fault. Yes, if you was subject to an unprovoked attack by a group of 20 chavs, and left for dead, you will have been recorded on their knock-off video mobile phones and will be found guilty in a court of law for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and using excessive force to protect yourself.

The chav is however misunderstood. Many people beleive that the chav is illiterate. This is untrue! How else would they know that the paper they have picked up is the 'daily sport'?

The chav also has a very high reproductive system, partially due to the fact that they would 'Shag a trapped rat' and their lack of experience with contraceptives.

The chav is also inexplicably strong as a pack of 20+. On it's own a chav is about as solid as a new-born baby's turd.

The female of the species is known as the Chavette, and commonly wears a white knock-off tracksuit and 9crt Gold plated Clown Pendant.

The male of the species is known as the Chav, and can be seen sporting burberry, tracksuits and cheap 9crt Gold plated Soveriegn Rings. These also double up as a weapon.

The prefered method of transport is a mates clapped out, highly modified, 2-door shit box of a car with an oversized exhaust and clap trap stereo. They are skilled in getting more people into a small car than any other species known to man kind.
Jordan, A.K.A Katie Price - The ultimate chavette; Big titted minger with a fake orange tan.

Blazin' Squad - Pack of numerous dickheads trying to rap someone elses songs.

Goldie lookin' chain - Group of welsh wannabe rappers.

There are many more. If you wish to see the Chav in it's natural habitat, visit McDonalds on a Saturday Afternoon or take an evening stroll through your local council estate. (Please, do not go 'Chav Watching' alone)
by ConcreteMonkey February 03, 2005
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