Calfe 

Verb. To fail in every way possible.

If one fails in something that it should not be possible to fail in, they have calfed.

A person that often bails out frequently.

Is Alex coming?
No. He totally calfed.

Calfe by YouKnowWhoIAmDontEvenTryToDeny June 10, 2009

caffercise 

exercising with the aid of caffeine

he has gone to caffercise

caffercise by jnsani January 6, 2020

caffercise 

hating to exercise, but loving it with caffeine -induced energy

my son loves to caffercise in the mornings

caffercise by jnsani January 8, 2020

cafebabe 

A well-known hex speak number:

0xCAFEBABE (hexadecimal) equals 3405691582 in decimal and is used as a magic number in Java.

Also, a babe you met in a cafe.

Adam: So, how are things with you and your 3405691582?
Brian: My cafebabe? I tried calling her but she wouldn't pick up.

cafebabe by Mike O'Donnald April 6, 2010

Cafe commander

One who feigns a knowledge of the military.

Trevor is a regular cafe commander, saying what the generals should do!

Cafe commander by I, Wreckerrr November 11, 2016

Vinyl Cafe 

A long-running CBC radio show which features Stuart McLean telling stories in what is supposed to be a wistful and nostalgic voice. Some love his style of reading, and others can't stand it.

You listen to the Vinyl Cafe? I don't know how you can stand Stuart McLean's tone of voice!

Vinyl Cafe by Chipperbit August 18, 2010

Makeupalley Cafe 

A sub-board of a makeup site comprised of white, 25-50 year old women. This is where women who are bitter at the world go to unleash their bitchery in order to feel better about themselves. Many are mothers which is frightening when you see how they act.

Common topic du jour's include:

picking every attractive woman posted apart (yet if a MUAer posts a picture of themselves "omg gorgeous!"), shitting on feminism, "flaming" people who say something a MUAer doesn't agree with, casual racism, pets, how making 70k a year means you're poor, college (most MUAers claim to have a college degree yet are still complete fools), shitty significant others, obviously made up stories, etc etc.

This is a very hostile environment & almost everyone who frequents Cafe has a severe mental/emotional issue. If you're better off than a majority of the people on the board you must be sickeningly humble or prepare for shit to be flung your way. Nice posters exist but are few and far between, and most "normal" and sane posters left a long time ago.

A rundown on some popular posters with names redacted to give you a feel of the board:

Unstable ex-junkie addicted to cosmetic injectables and tacky hair dye.

Popular for being cheery yet despised by some because she ruins their incessant brooding.

Sugar baby who hates women.

The Kim Kardashian of the board. Stupid and vapid yet people can't stop talking about her.

Racist republican who thinks native Americans deserved to have their land stolen.

Makeupalley cafe is a black hole filled to the brim with women you would never want to meet.

Makeupalley Cafe by Percy Jackson is Back June 10, 2014