The act of attempting to finger someone with your foot whilst watching Paul Blart Mall Cop, starring Kevin James as the titular mild-mannered security guard who must save the day when his shopping mall is taken over by a gang of organised crooks.
"omg becky, i cant believe dinosaur cum boy blarted me last night"

"eww blarting is so gross, at least he didn't grown ups 2 (featuring adam sandler, kevin james, chris rock and david spade) you like connor did to me the other night"
by Xx_blarter_xX December 27, 2022
The act of a male and female chest being pressed togeter making a seeming flatulent sound. Usually done during intercoarse.

The two lovers were wrestling when the boobs where pressed against the chest of the male the male mistankenly thought the woman had farted but was really blarting.
by the lovers April 27, 2009
A portmanteau of "blood" and "fart". Meant to be a flatus; a wind; a whoopee or an emittance of intestinal gas (also known as the "ass belch") which involuntarily becomes a discharge of slimy matter that is a mixture of excrement and blood.
Melvin: "Did you hear that? Is it Chinese new year already?"
Sparky: "Naah, I just blarted. I guess I need to go home and.. Yup."
by Burt Milhorse Eriksson April 13, 2021
A big 'ol fat nut
Jake: So, what were you doing last night?
Joseph: I was just having a good blart over your fit mum dude
Jake: Yummy
by CheekyGustavo October 5, 2018
Adjective, adverb;

Inspired by Kevin James in the movie, "Paul Blart Mall Cop", blart is a derogatory term for addressing and/or describing someone whom is overweight/obese.
1. "Hey, do you remember those girl's names who walked past us?"

"Which one, the tall girl or that blonde blart?"

2. The women felt socially awkward when a rather blarty looking man in an elevator ripped a mad, thick fart.

3. "Jarome, I don't even understand why you're together with that blart."

"I like some meat on my bones."
by BaconFlipper April 23, 2013
Justin: yo MoodA pass da blart!
Michael: gang!
by Opman April 23, 2019
A fart with blood in it. When you strain to fart, blood sprays into your underwear.
After jaay got rid of his wicked case of buttslaw, he still had the occasional painful blart.
by Legendary Films September 20, 2004