when you go to the supermarket with your mom and she says to stay in the car because she is just going to be 5 minutes to get a milk carton, but 30 minutes later when you died of heat in the car, she comes back with 7 bags of useless junk.
mom: stay in the car i'm just going to be 5 minutes
daughter/son: are you sure your going to be just 5 minutes?
daughter/son: *dies of heat*
mom: i'm back!
by else3 January 24, 2018
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A phrase said by people in hopes to shut you up about asking them when something will happen. 99% of the time, the anticipated event doesn't happen in 5 minutes. It often doesn't even happen in 15 minutes.
At 3:10 PM
Person 1: When the hell are you getting here? This was scheduled for 3:00 PM!
Person 2: In 5 minutes.
Person 1: OK.
***20 minutes later***
Person 1: It's been way more than 5 minutes, what the hell are you doing?
Person 2: hold on! Why are you so impatient?
Person 1: Because you told me you'd be here in 5 minutes!
by lordcg January 8, 2018
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One of the most awful content farms on the internet, along with Blossom/So Yummy. They'll post the same "hacks" and "tips" over and over again, many of which are really dangerous, especially for their target audience - kids.

Some people will say that they're completely blind to the danger of most of the actions in their videos, but they probably know what they're doing - after all, publicity is publicity.
1. Person A: "Gee, how'd you get that burn on your hand?"
Person B: "I tried following a stupid 5-Minute Crafts cooking hack. Ugh."
Person A: "Poor thing. 5-Minute Crafts is the worst."

2. *scrolling through Snapchat* "OH CRAP THEY'RE ON SNAP TOO"
by Val the Gay Bitch February 21, 2020
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A clickbaity channel with almost 30M subs, mostly watched by kids and moms. Most of their videos show stupid "crafts" you will NEVER actulally use in your entire life
5 minute crafts: 42 HOLY GRAIL HACKS THAT WILL SAVE YOU A FORTUNE
Average people: These are so USEFUL!
ACHIEVMENT GET!: Waste 12 mins of ur life and repeat it daily
by awesomegam August 7, 2018
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YouTube channel with almost 70M subs that does dumb shit like drilling a hole in sausage to use as a straw. You get the idea.
8 year old: 5 Minute Crafts is so useful!
Mom that spoils child: Yes sweetie it is!
Mom's thoughts: (shoot me.)
by jewishburger November 10, 2020
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This phrase means much the same as coffee penus, but can be used by both males and females (since all females except for perhaps late pre-op transsexuals do not have dicks).
{Jesús}: Cummon Horhay, let's get going!
{Horhay}: I'm afraid I'll have to pass; I've got the 5 minute pisses from having drank half a pot of coffee.
by Telephony May 18, 2014
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When you sit near somebody in a waiting room and talk to you until you or their name is called for their appointment
by Upstairsdragon March 7, 2016
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