U-1206 sunk to a toilet flush.
by Never gonna give you up! February 07, 2021
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part V
I wish I knew how you’re doing.
How are you? Are you healthy? Enjoying life? Still the goofy big guy with the prosciutto slice on his beard? Still acting like you don’t want to compete but then winning big time? I hope you’re happy. I wanted to ask about you so many times but didn’t because I knew it was too risky for both of us. This episode of BM is too long to be told here.
I wish we could talk.
Why don’t you want to talk to me? Don’t you want to clear things out? Doesn’t it bug you? Truth won’t hurt us, but misinterpretation of digits does. And I’m already so weak; a lifelong trauma of loss, blame, guilt and shame is a heavy load, and the baggage just keeps piling up. Perhaps you can relate. I understand you are mad with me for not being direct. The first contact was by mistake, honestly. But I was studying Jung a lot back then, and I took it as a sign, when I shouldn’t. I’m sorry. All next attempts were intentional, but I never lied. When I wrote or spoke in digits was just because it was a lot easier than saying “Hey, wanna come over?” or God forbid “Hey, I love you, dumbass!”. I need to see the person’s eyes to be able to establish trust. Phone is my weak point, I’m much better with feelings in person, when I can see where I stand. You always wore sunglasses. I could never tell how you feel towards me, and I was told you find me annoying. This is another reason why I’m so insecure. I’m sorry.
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part V
I wish I knew how you’re doing.
How are you? Are you healthy? Enjoying life? Still the goofy big guy with the prosciutto slice on his beard? Still acting like you don’t want to compete but then winning big time? I hope you’re happy. I wanted to ask about you so many times but didn’t because I knew it was too risky for both of us. This episode of BM is too long to be told here.
I wish we could talk.
Why don’t you want to talk to me? Don’t you want to clear things out? Doesn’t it bug you? Truth won’t hurt us, but misinterpretation of digits does. And I’m already so weak; a lifelong trauma of loss, blame, guilt and shame is a heavy load, and the baggage just keeps piling up. Perhaps you can relate. I understand you are mad with me for not being direct. The first contact was by mistake, honestly. But I was studying Jung a lot back then, and I took it as a sign, when I shouldn’t. I’m sorry. All next attempts were intentional, but I never lied. When I wrote or spoke in digits was just because it was a lot easier than saying “Hey, wanna come over?” or God forbid “Hey, I love you, dumbass!”. I need to see the person’s eyes to be able to establish trust. Phone is my weak point, I’m much better with feelings in person, when I can see where I stand. You always wore sunglasses. I could never tell how you feel towards me, and I was told you find me annoying. This is another reason why I’m so insecure. I’m sorry.
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part I
I wish I knew if the numerous visits from a specific country to my job profile is you.
It’s Brazil and Singapore these days, but I don’t see any details, only the place and the hour. And the hours are visible only on the day. Imagine discovering that you had 10+ visits from the same country a day earlier, and your gut is telling you “It was him!”. So frustrating... I know this is probably VPN, but can you please tell me at least if it’s really you?
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part I
I wish I knew if the numerous visits from a specific country to my job profile is you.
It’s Brazil and Singapore these days, but I don’t see any details, only the place and the hour. And the hours are visible only on the day. Imagine discovering that you had 10+ visits from the same country a day earlier, and your gut is telling you “It was him!”. So frustrating... I know this is probably VPN, but can you please tell me at least if it’s really you?
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part VI
I wish this love was real.
Tell me it’s real. Text me, call me, or tell me to text you something absurd and you’ll reply. Assure me you won’t hurt me again. Or even better, come to me. I think I remember you mentioning you hack; if so, you probably already have my address. Just come here, you can leave whenever you want. Even if you come to tell me that you want nothing to do with me, to tell me I have a mental problem. I’d prefer it if you came to tell me you love me and then let me f*ck your brains out, but I’ll survive the dark scenario, too. You don’t even have to finish the coffee. I just want to see you.
Because I love you. Here, I said it. 222
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part VI
I wish this love was real.
Tell me it’s real. Text me, call me, or tell me to text you something absurd and you’ll reply. Assure me you won’t hurt me again. Or even better, come to me. I think I remember you mentioning you hack; if so, you probably already have my address. Just come here, you can leave whenever you want. Even if you come to tell me that you want nothing to do with me, to tell me I have a mental problem. I’d prefer it if you came to tell me you love me and then let me f*ck your brains out, but I’ll survive the dark scenario, too. You don’t even have to finish the coffee. I just want to see you.
Because I love you. Here, I said it. 222
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part IV
I wish I was braver. I wish I was stronger.
I wanted to see you so badly the last time. I signalled you, and I even contemplated calling you. But I chickened out. So many failed attempts… And I’m probably still blocked anyway, aren’t I? What would you do? If this connection is real, how come you never write or call? I heard you’re with someone, is that it? Please trust me when I say I would never try to break or hurt your relationship in any way. The sexting digits were for fun – not that I wouldn’t want to do most of those things with you (except for the pussy puncher thing, do people really do that? Don’t they know that once stretched to that extent, it can never return back to the normal size?! And then it’s suddenly a sausage in a tunnel…) – but I would never participate in cheating. I hope those rare occasions were enough for you to get to know me in this sense. I would never hurt another. If your situation is such that you cannot or don’t want to see me because of your better half, just write it here; I’ll delete your number and be gone from your life forever.
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part IV
I wish I was braver. I wish I was stronger.
I wanted to see you so badly the last time. I signalled you, and I even contemplated calling you. But I chickened out. So many failed attempts… And I’m probably still blocked anyway, aren’t I? What would you do? If this connection is real, how come you never write or call? I heard you’re with someone, is that it? Please trust me when I say I would never try to break or hurt your relationship in any way. The sexting digits were for fun – not that I wouldn’t want to do most of those things with you (except for the pussy puncher thing, do people really do that? Don’t they know that once stretched to that extent, it can never return back to the normal size?! And then it’s suddenly a sausage in a tunnel…) – but I would never participate in cheating. I hope those rare occasions were enough for you to get to know me in this sense. I would never hurt another. If your situation is such that you cannot or don’t want to see me because of your better half, just write it here; I’ll delete your number and be gone from your life forever.
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part II
I wish I was able to interpret all digits correctly.
Only last weekend did I realize that all those times when I wanted to meet you (every f*ing time I went to see my family and friends; I would do anything for 5 minutes with you), the digits potentially didn’t signal that you're applying Rule 724 or that I am a 403 or “a snake” from 1148. Perhaps they were a 724 poem, a 4:03 or a love confession 1148. Or perhaps you are as bad as “the monster” pictured you. I never believed him entirely. At least until the digits from November last year. If such numbers should be interpreted with the bad definitions, please tell me why. I need to know. I won’t blame you or hold a grudge against you, I promise, I’m not like that. I’m sure I must have done something terrible to you, and it’s eating me alive not knowing what it is. I want to reflect and apologise sincerely, even if it must be done here. Please. There’s a big chance I’ll have to spend my birthday in the ICU and the fear of experiencing another near-death scenario is overwhelming. Please, give me this peace of mind, regardless of what you hold against me. I’m sure you’ll feel better afterwards, too. In particular if I don’t wake up (but don’t worry, I’ve decided I will, and on my own this time!!).
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part II
I wish I was able to interpret all digits correctly.
Only last weekend did I realize that all those times when I wanted to meet you (every f*ing time I went to see my family and friends; I would do anything for 5 minutes with you), the digits potentially didn’t signal that you're applying Rule 724 or that I am a 403 or “a snake” from 1148. Perhaps they were a 724 poem, a 4:03 or a love confession 1148. Or perhaps you are as bad as “the monster” pictured you. I never believed him entirely. At least until the digits from November last year. If such numbers should be interpreted with the bad definitions, please tell me why. I need to know. I won’t blame you or hold a grudge against you, I promise, I’m not like that. I’m sure I must have done something terrible to you, and it’s eating me alive not knowing what it is. I want to reflect and apologise sincerely, even if it must be done here. Please. There’s a big chance I’ll have to spend my birthday in the ICU and the fear of experiencing another near-death scenario is overwhelming. Please, give me this peace of mind, regardless of what you hold against me. I’m sure you’ll feel better afterwards, too. In particular if I don’t wake up (but don’t worry, I’ve decided I will, and on my own this time!!).
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025
WISHFUL
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part III
I wish I didn’t feel the way I do.
I’m so sorry I can’t get you out of my head. If you only knew how this came to being… It’s surreal. I’m sure it will go away with time, and I stay away, but you’re present always. I see your face, I feel your energy, I felt hugged, I felt kissed, I felt even a lot better things. There are times when I could swear that you’re next to me; I can smell you, feel your body leaning against me. And how can this be?!! I don’t even know you! We hugged a couple of times, but how can my brain still remember the smell?! Sometimes you come at the worst possible moments, but I’m still grateful. I love it when it happens; it’s nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I wish it could last forever. Is it real or just in my head? Does it go both ways?
aka
A Letter to the One I Love
Part III
I wish I didn’t feel the way I do.
I’m so sorry I can’t get you out of my head. If you only knew how this came to being… It’s surreal. I’m sure it will go away with time, and I stay away, but you’re present always. I see your face, I feel your energy, I felt hugged, I felt kissed, I felt even a lot better things. There are times when I could swear that you’re next to me; I can smell you, feel your body leaning against me. And how can this be?!! I don’t even know you! We hugged a couple of times, but how can my brain still remember the smell?! Sometimes you come at the worst possible moments, but I’m still grateful. I love it when it happens; it’s nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I wish it could last forever. Is it real or just in my head? Does it go both ways?
1206
by Cheer up, sweety! June 02, 2025