Spaff Torch

A torch emitting ultra violet (UV) or "black light". Allows the user to see things not necessarily visible to the naked eye.

Where's James?

Oh, he's cheking the bunkhouse out using the spaff torch

by Fatkid_13 January 20, 2025

Spud Spaff

Definition:
A tragically unimpressive or awkwardly timed climax—especially one that happens so fast, it might as well have come from a potato.
Also used to describe any sexual finish that’s laughably underwhelming, lumpy, or just plain weird.

To spud spaff – To blow your load embarrassingly quick, often accompanied by a weird noise, facial twitch, or apology.

by Spaghetti Pencil June 14, 2025

Spaff Master

Someone who is such a wanker, that they could be considered the president of wankers.

Dean, you’re such a Spaff Master.

by DangerMonk1854 June 01, 2018

Smartie Spaff

The act of shaking smarties from a tube, held at crotch height, into or onto someones face.

"Mate, let's smartie spaff that girl!"

by Sheddybear October 26, 2011

[Spaff] [Wagon]

1. a person who is a goon.

2. a person who is only good to deposit sperm in or over.

an insult.

1.
A: mate I know i said i'd go for a beer but i'm working.
B: oh you spaff wagon.

2. that thick fucking spaff wagon!

by Guido of midland origin. August 29, 2008

Spaff Pocket

A vagina that is a pocket for your spaff (cum)

Kev-'Oi Randy see that hot girl over there?'
Randy-' You bet I do Kev, I'd definitely shag her spaff pocket.'

by oscrape May 03, 2018

spaff lord

Someone who excels in the art of jizzing.

Jimmy: Did you see the new Kid!
Paul: Yeah apparently he's the new spaff lord.

by heh3heh3heh3 September 04, 2019