If you'll pardon the pun 

Something to say after you've said literally anything, unless what you've just said actually contained a pun.

Made popular by the wonderful Moses Beacon, from the excellent comedy 'Come Fly With Me'.

Moses: My name is Moses Beacon, if you'll pardon the pun!

If you'll pardon the pun by Smackaine January 27, 2011

I beg your pardon 

A gentleman way of saying "What the fuck did you say to me you piece of shit"

Person: Go fuck yourself!
Me: I beg your pardon?

(Alternate Universe)
Person: Go fuck yourself!
Me: What the fuck did you say to me you piece of shit?

I beg your pardon by ChiefBokMalo July 16, 2020

relationship pardon 

Where, typically at the end of a relationship, one or usually both parties extend forgiveness for all bad acts performed during the course of the relationship.

Ex 1: You never apologized for x.
Ex 2: I didn't have to. It was covered under the relationship pardon.

relationship pardon by [e-mail] February 5, 2009

I beg your pardon 

Englishman asking for something to be repeated.

Get your balls of my face
I beg your pardon?
You heard what i fucking said

I beg your pardon by BritishsSpoon March 20, 2020

i beg your pardon 

please

can you i beg your pardon not do that

i beg your pardon by carolinebondbeatsmewithabat February 9, 2023

Beggum Pardon

Something you say when you don't hear what someone said. Or when in disbelief of what you've just heard.

Go get my shoes. Beggum Pardon? You heard me, go get my shoes.

Beggum Pardon by Garrett March 26, 2003

Blanket Pardon 

A pass to do anything as long as it's "under the blanket" (no holds barred). Could start off as just snuggling, but end up in explicit activity (i.e Netflix n Chill).

Him: Is it possible to get a blanket pardon on the first date?
Her : Depends on how much you spend on dinner...

Blanket Pardon by AuWhiNker April 8, 2021