one eyed heat seeking moisture missile

1. a penis, or cock if you will

Man, that little slutty bar chick over there needs my one eyed heat seeking moisture missile.

by Bud E Love May 14, 2003

moisture farmer

somebody who is, was or always will be jacking off, a.k.a 'farming' the 'moisture'.

don't you reckon mark zuckerberg would be a massive moisture farmer?

by alexisalive.exe May 20, 2023

Moisture Baby

A moisture baby is the off spring of a Moisture Pig or the smaller more athletic Swampy D. You can spot a moisture baby due To the fact there are usually 3-5 of them and most of them have different dads and live in a cramped apartment typically low income housing and run around like wild animals. The primary goal of a moisture baby it to become an exact duplicate of the Moisture Pig or the more athletic Swampy D.

Holy shit look at the number of moisture babies running around in the store.

My kid was attacked by a herd of moisture baby’s and almost died. Thank god he had good cardio he was able to run away, after tossing down a twinkie to distract them!

by Bshifters December 19, 2019

homemade moisturizer

when that creepy kid busts a nut, puts it in a container, and gives it to you as lotion

or when you and bae wanna get freaky

Jonah hit me up with some homemade moisturizer last night, want some? *rubs it all over face*

by satansnigga666 September 2, 2016

Moisture

Uzair Tariq

Uzair Tariq is the definition of moisture

by Nigga Penis August 20, 2021

Gooch Moisture

The moisture that can accumulate on the surface of the gooch, on a humid day

"Dude I total forgot my mustache gel in the car"

"Don't worry dude, whenever I run out I just take my fingers and sculpt my mustache with some gooch moisture"

by the real D! Ya dig?!? October 13, 2016

Moisture Daddy

Unlike the sugar daddy a Moisture Daddy is not older or wealthy, but has zero wealth and poor hygiene, Moisture Daddys typically weigh in at about 115-160 pounds, the best way to pick out a Moisture Daddy is they are typically small in stature and skinny. A moisture Daddy receives no benefits unlike the sugar daddy, they just take care of the Moisture Pig or the smaller more athletic Swampy D. The Moisture Daddy feeds them so they can continue to eat and sweat and sweat and eat. The Moisture Daddy is very loyal to the Moisture Pig and Swampy D, they will continue to feed them until they can no longer fit through a normal sized doorway.

That poor man must be a moisture daddy, because he has no idea of how large his spouse is!

This dude has to be a moisture daddy, look at all of the crappy food in his 3 shopping carts and he paid with a EBT card.

by Bshifters December 20, 2019