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captain futon

n. a guy who sleeps on a futon...and particularly likes to tell you when he is transforming it from couch to bed form or vise versa.
Captain Futon to girl: I think im gonna lie down on my futon, gimme a second to transform it from couch to bed form.
by randomness42467 February 21, 2009
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Captalker

Captalker is a person that continuously lies for no given reason.
“Kabir said he gonna beat your ass again. My mans really a captalker
by The Boy 👦 Harmann November 17, 2020
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The Captain John Morgan

The act of Inserting the index finger into a vagina for pleasure only to leave it there stationary until awkward silence is broken.
It is customary to salute these men when seen with the arm extended and the index finger pointed to the horizon.
Well David finally maned up last night... sort of. He pulled the Captain John Morgan on Suzie. hahahaahha
by KilldozerUnited February 5, 2009
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space captain

A song originally performed by Joe Cocker and covered by bands such as The Black Crows and Herbie Hancock.

OR

The sort of person who makes comments that are wildly off topic or who's behavior indicates that they are paying attention to life only about 1% of the time.
"I just watched the vid of the Black Crows playing 'Space Captain' live in SanFran in 2005 and it was wicked awesome!"

OR

Person 1: "Did you hear about how Julia caught the microwave on fire by microwaving her food in foil?"

Person 2: "Yeah, she's really space captain."
by Mr. Fosi September 23, 2010
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captain clusterfuck

A person who is completely unable to do anything right or to make things work. If given any task he/she will fuck it up causing problems for everybody.
Mike: How will be in charge of the christmas office party this year?

Al: I will take the title of marster of the ceremony?
Mike: Al, the only title you can take is Captain Clusterfuck. You can not organize a trip to the bathroom, let alone a party. Everything given to you is doomed for failure.
by buck neckid ALM December 6, 2010
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Captain Beefheart

Captain Beefheart (aka Don Van Vliet) and The Magic Band produced what is commonly regarded by critics and fans as one of rock's few truly original bodies of work. Combining elements of free jazz, blues and rock, they produced something distinctly different from anything which had ever been heard before, and heavily influenced a wide range of later musicians such as Tom Waits, PJ Harvey and John Lydon.

In the words of Frank Zappa, "Listen, be quiet and pay attention to this man's music, because if you don't, you might miss something important and we wouldn't want that to happen to you. You need all the friends you can get."

Quite simply the most original and greatest musician of the last 100 years.
You've never heard of Beefheart? You must be fucking lame.
by russxl February 1, 2005
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Captain Charisma

Christian's nickname since he is one of the most charismatic wrestlers in the WWE today.
"I'm Captain Charisma and that's how I roll."-Christian
by Alex January 5, 2005
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