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not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet

not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet Is an odd variant of “not the sharpest knife in the drawer” and “like a bull in a china shop

It is said that the term originates from the Great Plains/Lower Delta in the Midwest US. Most say the saying came from a notably dumb duck hunter. He didn’t understand the two aforementioned terms “not the sharpest knife in the drawer” and “like a bull in a china shop” but instead of learning what they meant he created the abomination of a saying “not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet” When the poor bastard said it the first time it caught everyone off guard. Everyone in the duck blind stopped what they were doing and begged for further elaboration of the slang term. He refused to elaborate. Without a concrete answer speculation ran wild but no could adequately explain it.

From that point onward the term disseminated across the country. Most people use it ironically for a replacement term. It has caused great confusion and hilarity over the decades
Person 1: did you see that duck dive right into the decoy? That was crazy, it took that damn thing out!
Person 2: yeah that sumbitch is not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet
Person 3: hol up. What does that mean?
Person 2: *refuses to elaborate*
by MFG.24 June 13, 2025
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you are not the father

The opposite of you are the father. Meaning a male is not the biological father of a child.

Most often also heard on the Maury Show, when the girl who was banging 16 different guys at the time she got pregnant has no idea who her baby daddy is.

Unlike its counterpart, the words every guy wants to hear if they had sex with some of the nasty ho's on there.
Denise, a 17 year old mother of Shantell, is 1000% sure Elron is the father of the little girl. Elron has stated 'Dat baby don' look nutin' like me' and 'Dat girl iz a hoe!" while Denise screams at him to 'Be a man!' and "Step up to yo' responsibilitays!" Maury holds the envelope-

"When it comes to the case of 2-year old Shantell, Elron...you are NOT the father!"

*Elron then stands up overjoyed and elated, and calls Denise a hoe, slut, and bitch or other similar words as she runs off crying. Elron then whoops it up with the crowd while Denise screams in agony
by ACG2x September 8, 2004
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I'm not the one

Don't funk with me. You are biting off more than you can chew. I'm more than just talk. You are starting a fight with the wrong person. "I'm not the one"
"I'll beat your A$$"
"I'm not the one"
by Lele skinny mini December 18, 2014
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You are not the father

The words that every man loves to hear!
Maury: I hold in my hand the results to the paternity test and...

Cole: *sweating*

Maury: Cole You are not the father!

Cole: I told you bitch I wasn't!
by Ari Shaffir September 25, 2011
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You are NOT the father

If you are on the Maury show, and as your head is producing a shower of sweat, to hear those words is like dodging a bullet Maxtrix style. You gloat and probably dance around while that hoe breaks down in tears and runs off to the backstage area to cry harder and sometimes louder.
"In the case of 7th month old child Shauna, Jason, you are NOT the father."

*She breaks down in tears and runs off backstage while Jason does a Michael Jackson impersonation and yells, "THE KID IS NOT MY SON!!!"*
by Royal_Defense710 October 18, 2014
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i am not the one

A way of saying "don't f*&%$ with me" if someone is trying to start shit with you in any way shape or form or I will retaliate.
Vonshay was tryin' to be up in my shit, and I'm like, bitch I am NOT the one.
by Ekeoutmyisis July 30, 2016
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