Failchild

A child of extreme failure.

A child who doesn't have a life or purpose in life, only to destroy and fuck stuff up.

Steve: (fucking stuff up) Oops, oops, oops, sorry!

Everybody else: Fucking hell Steve stop being such a failchild!

by Failchild Numero Uno February 24, 2011

Infomercial Fail

To fail amazingly badly at a basic or simple task. Infomercials use this kind of exaggerated, highly unlikely failure to demonstrate the nonexistent or dubious "problem" the product in question supposedly solves (i.e. trying to crack an egg into a bowl and instead splattering egg and crushed shell pieces all over everything within three feet, hammering a nail into drywall and sending the hammer right through the wall, eating a sandwich and having its entire contents fall directly into your lap, etc.).

Just full-on infomercial failed at cracking an egg. Twice.

by StromCarlson June 1, 2010

FailCorn

To fail as bad as humanly possible. Worse than epic fail.

"A rock got stuck under the lawn mower, when i went to get it out my hand got sliced off because it was still on."
"FailCorn."

by TCWCKG August 6, 2009

Fail Goose

A Fail Goose is someone who does something so massively lame that they have simply failed at life. They are in turn called a fail goose.

Also, the collective term for a group of people failing together is a flock of fail geese.

This term is becoming popular and is sometimes seen tagged through twitter as #failgoose.

Jean: You spelled together wrong, its spelt T-O-G-E-T-H-R
Bob: OMG, ur such a fail goose.

by djkizza September 19, 2009

Fail Mob

When a flash mob goes horribly wrong.

"That was such a fail mob, they announced what they were going to do before anyone even started dancing."

by Tsahcomplice November 23, 2010

Priority Fail

Any point in time when a spouse, child, family member or ANYONE ELSE in your physical perimeter becomes subordinate to text, email, tweet or any other virtual bullshit method of communication.

Hey mom, did you hear about the kid that turned COVID positive at school today?
***continues texting***
Yeah, so it turns out that he was at the graduation party last week.
***continues texting***
And so I got tested for the virus.
***continues texting***
I'm positive for COVID-19

WHAT!!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING!? YOU COULD INFECT ALL OF US!!

(Priority Fail)

by YAWA July 14, 2020

Fail like a Whale

A fucking retard thing some douchebag says to be funny.

You Fail like a Whale, bitch!

by americanaidan November 25, 2010