Spoons fever

Spoons fever is a severe form of depression gained specifically from working at a Wetherspoon. It can be identified by grumpiness, easilily irritable mood, dead look in someone’s eyes and just a general loss of the will to live.

“It was really busy in the pub on Monday and I looked over at Andy who was in the middle of pouring eight pints of Tennants and three pints of Guinness for a group of guys and I could instantly tell he was getting spoons fever from the look on his face as the guys kept changing the order.”

“Don’t expect me to be in a good mood today I have spoons fever I’ve been working for seven days in a row and still have three more until I am off, I need a holiday!”

by SassySpooner January 8, 2019

Bleached the spoons

To make a remark on social media that opens you up to ridicule and hilarity.

I bleached the spoons when I said One Direction were musicians.

I bleached the spoons when I didn't know who Shakespeare was.

by Zixer May 5, 2014

Cup and Spoon

Cup and Spoon. - The act of sleeping with somebody, while you spoon them, and cup a part of their anatomy in a close embrace.

She decided to cup and spoon me all night, which meant I had an 8 hour testicular exam of the nicest form.

by EvilElephantitis May 24, 2020

spoon craters

When food has the appearance of being dipped into or snitched by means of a spoon.

Mom knew John had eaten some of her special chocolate ice cream because the surface was marred with tell-tale spoon craters.

by T-R3Z October 19, 2010

Licking the Spoon

The well kept, darkest of secrets, that you love to lick the speculum clean like a good little boy. Highly guarded and known only by you, your girlfriend/wife, her gyno-man and your mother who started it all by handing you a spoon full of cookie dough.

I was licking the spoon as soon as possible when my wife returned from her gyno appointment carrying a zip-lock with a spec in it.

by Pierced69 November 7, 2021

Hard spooning

The act of spooning a girl/guy while having your dick inside of them

Me and my gf was hard spooning last night, it was really nice!

by ToxicVideo September 29, 2017

cool spoon

When Corey is hanging out with you and takes out a spoon and shoves into his rectum and dances around like a Mexican jumping bean

Hey look the guy is doing the cool spoon and he is great at it.

by Sakalaraka June 17, 2016