Speed wipe

Another Name For Toilet Paper

Guy 1: (Gets to end of roll) We need some more speed wipe

by john_doe 123456 July 9, 2009

Wipe you off

To kick someone’s ass!

I’m glad you got out of there OK that guy was about to wipe you off!

by Knasty July 24, 2020

Polite Wipe

The perfunctory wipe-down of a surface before someone else uses the still-filthy surface. It is commonly performed as a means to signal care and consideration for a third party without actually caring enough to clean properly.

I gave the phone a polite wipe before moving desks.

by Office Drone #695 September 19, 2019

Wet wipe

Someone who always complains and moans about every and anything!

Ashley is a wet wipe who doesn't like to socialise

by Cornfedmaster July 5, 2023

ever wipe

When you are trying to wipe up after a messy poop, but finding on each successive wipe the remnants of poop never go away, leading to an ever wipe.

Man I had an ever wipe this morning, I know its gonna be a bad day

by HK_MP5 June 7, 2018

Waikiki Wipe

A turd taken in Hawaii after a large feed where the turd is so large it rests on the base of the toilet bowl and breaches the water in the toilet bowl

I ate a Quarter Pounder and nuggets last night and had to suffer through a Waikiki Wipe this morning. I am exhausted.

by Unofficial Mayor March 4, 2018

Mind wipe

A phrase that you say to your friends before telling them something so unhinged that you would like them to pretend it was never said

Person 1: "Honestly, guys, mind wipe?"
Person 2 & 3 (in unison): "Of course!"
Person 1: "I recently pretended to be disabled so that I could get out of a sexual assault charge."

by Norman Pretzels July 9, 2025