A sarcastic and insulting response expressing disinterest to a useless, boring or irrelevant story while also calling the person a ho.
Jessica: Did you know that approximately one in five women worldwide report being sexually abused before the age of 15!
Joey: Cool story ho.
Joey: Cool story ho.
by Dejayelkay May 20, 2011
Get the cool story ho mug.this is a sex story
Andre was the hottest guy in college. I was lucky because i was his roommate. when i came home he asked me, "why did you get here so late?" i told him, "i can't tell you its too embarrassing."
"just tell me im gonna figure it out someday"
"fine, i got a wax"
"for who? it has to be for someone"
"im not telling you"
"Can i at least see it?" he said.
"no," i walked away to take a shower.
in the shower i heard a squeaking at the door. Andre walked in naked. "you look nice," he said. "go away!" i told him. felling my C boobs giggle. i saw his dick getting harder. he walked inside the shower. i knew i wanted him so i let him stay.
he started touching where i got a shaved and slowly massaged my vagina. i moaned. he did it harder and harder. then he licked me and kissed me. i felt like i was going to have an orgasm. when i did i knew i had to repay him.
i bent down and began giving him a handjob. when he got harder i started sucking him. he moaned in excitement. first i licked the head then i sucked his 9" dick. after i swallowed him whole he cummed in my mouth. i drank it all it didnt taste bad anyways. i was surprised i didn't gag at all. i wanted him more now.
"get inside me!" i screamed.
he rubbed me with his big dick and inserted himself in. he did it faster and faster, deeper and deeper. "HARDER, ANDRE, HARDER!" i yelled. i let go of my cum and his came also. i felt our juices mix together.
Andre was the hottest guy in college. I was lucky because i was his roommate. when i came home he asked me, "why did you get here so late?" i told him, "i can't tell you its too embarrassing."
"just tell me im gonna figure it out someday"
"fine, i got a wax"
"for who? it has to be for someone"
"im not telling you"
"Can i at least see it?" he said.
"no," i walked away to take a shower.
in the shower i heard a squeaking at the door. Andre walked in naked. "you look nice," he said. "go away!" i told him. felling my C boobs giggle. i saw his dick getting harder. he walked inside the shower. i knew i wanted him so i let him stay.
he started touching where i got a shaved and slowly massaged my vagina. i moaned. he did it harder and harder. then he licked me and kissed me. i felt like i was going to have an orgasm. when i did i knew i had to repay him.
i bent down and began giving him a handjob. when he got harder i started sucking him. he moaned in excitement. first i licked the head then i sucked his 9" dick. after i swallowed him whole he cummed in my mouth. i drank it all it didnt taste bad anyways. i was surprised i didn't gag at all. i wanted him more now.
"get inside me!" i screamed.
he rubbed me with his big dick and inserted himself in. he did it faster and faster, deeper and deeper. "HARDER, ANDRE, HARDER!" i yelled. i let go of my cum and his came also. i felt our juices mix together.
by bitch you cant see January 3, 2013
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This is a Sex Story:
Brian invited Ellie over to his house, so she went over to Brian's house. Ellie had a crush on Brian so feeling very naughty she wore booty shorts and a button down top. and no underwear. Ellie rang the door bell and Brian answered right away and invited Ellie up to his room. He sat on the bed so she followed, and sat down. He scooted closer to her so there face were right next to eachother. He said "Have I ever told you how gorgeus you are" she immediatley kissed him. They started kissing and it got very "passionate". He started unbuttoning her shirt and rubbing her boobs, while she was slipping her hand into his pants giving him a handjob. They began kissing so passionatley he fell backwards and she was now on top of him. She ripped off his shirt super fast as he took off her shorts. Ellie was now fully naked and Brian was in his boxers she ripped those off too. They both started cuming and he was going in and out of her vagina with his penis. But Ellie felt like she needed more, Brian knew what this met. He flipped her over so she was now lying down on the bed. He separated her legs and started rubbing her clit. Within two minutes Elliie was having a orgasam. "OH OH OH BRIAN FASTER, SWITCH DIRECTIONS! THIS FEELS AMAZING DONT STOP....OH OH OH UGHHHH OH OH! YES THIS IS AMAZING PLEASE DONT STOP EVER! IM CUMMING DONT STOP" He started licking her clit making her give it up to him. She was now willing to have every sex possible...which they did.
Brian invited Ellie over to his house, so she went over to Brian's house. Ellie had a crush on Brian so feeling very naughty she wore booty shorts and a button down top. and no underwear. Ellie rang the door bell and Brian answered right away and invited Ellie up to his room. He sat on the bed so she followed, and sat down. He scooted closer to her so there face were right next to eachother. He said "Have I ever told you how gorgeus you are" she immediatley kissed him. They started kissing and it got very "passionate". He started unbuttoning her shirt and rubbing her boobs, while she was slipping her hand into his pants giving him a handjob. They began kissing so passionatley he fell backwards and she was now on top of him. She ripped off his shirt super fast as he took off her shorts. Ellie was now fully naked and Brian was in his boxers she ripped those off too. They both started cuming and he was going in and out of her vagina with his penis. But Ellie felt like she needed more, Brian knew what this met. He flipped her over so she was now lying down on the bed. He separated her legs and started rubbing her clit. Within two minutes Elliie was having a orgasam. "OH OH OH BRIAN FASTER, SWITCH DIRECTIONS! THIS FEELS AMAZING DONT STOP....OH OH OH UGHHHH OH OH! YES THIS IS AMAZING PLEASE DONT STOP EVER! IM CUMMING DONT STOP" He started licking her clit making her give it up to him. She was now willing to have every sex possible...which they did.
by SexyBitchwholikesmyclit June 6, 2010
Get the Sex Story mug.When in an awkward situation, go into akward tent postion. From there lock fingers together and let you hands fall from your head into a vague basket shape near your abdomine. You can swing the basket now while saying "good story basket, tell me a tale" after this it is best to make up a great story to distract who ever else is witnessing the awkward situation. Thus, making everything better.
You're standing with a group of friends, then suddenly one drops dead. Normally this would be awkward, fortunetly you know about the good story basket. You then proceed to make the basket, then tell a tale about pirates, distracting everyone from the dead friend.
by Stealth Von Havoc August 30, 2008
Get the good story basket mug.1970s/80s: You are about to lie or make an excuse.
mid90s onwards: You are in bit of a soup and you have a semi-valid excuse. So you just say "funny story" and its understood that you are not going to hold your end of the bargain.
mid90s onwards: You are in bit of a soup and you have a semi-valid excuse. So you just say "funny story" and its understood that you are not going to hold your end of the bargain.
Friend1: Did I see you driving my car yesterday ?
Friend2: Funny story... I was looking for _my_ car keys and ...
Manager: How are we placed on the back order from Big Company ?
You: Funny Story.
Friend2: Funny story... I was looking for _my_ car keys and ...
Manager: How are we placed on the back order from Big Company ?
You: Funny Story.
by alwarming October 3, 2011
Get the Funny Story mug.by NnNateEe May 15, 2020
Get the Toy Story 4 mug.(hopefully this is long enough to jerk off to)
I was in my room when i looked out the window and seen a girl in a thin swimsuit and no bra, she had black duck tape x's on her nipples and i instantly got a boner, with my buldge in my pants, i ran outside and brought her to my house, she sat down and i handed her some clothes. i think she noticed my rock because she denied the clothes and strted playing with it through my pants, i reached for the tape on her huge titties, she said "not yet" I stood there confused. Despite this i pulled down my pants and i got a nice handjob, she took out a pocket pussy, handed it to me and said, "be right back". she came back with some tissue and lotion, "we wont be needing those" i said. "but why? its not like-" i stuck my rock in her mouth and gave it about 5 seconds, i came and she swallowed, i didnt care how sensitive my penis was, i put it in her pussy and caarried her all the way upstairs, we pulled a allnighter and we never took the tappe off.
I was in my room when i looked out the window and seen a girl in a thin swimsuit and no bra, she had black duck tape x's on her nipples and i instantly got a boner, with my buldge in my pants, i ran outside and brought her to my house, she sat down and i handed her some clothes. i think she noticed my rock because she denied the clothes and strted playing with it through my pants, i reached for the tape on her huge titties, she said "not yet" I stood there confused. Despite this i pulled down my pants and i got a nice handjob, she took out a pocket pussy, handed it to me and said, "be right back". she came back with some tissue and lotion, "we wont be needing those" i said. "but why? its not like-" i stuck my rock in her mouth and gave it about 5 seconds, i came and she swallowed, i didnt care how sensitive my penis was, i put it in her pussy and caarried her all the way upstairs, we pulled a allnighter and we never took the tappe off.
by sexymanjeff May 18, 2021
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