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Toilet Paper Hoarding

What all the fat fucks in the United States decided to do when they heard that a pandemic was coming.

No one knows exactly why this occurred since toilet paper cannot protect you from the No No Virus. If you ask a hoarder they will use the lazy excuse about indefinite quarantines as though that justifies buying 3 years worth from Costco by the pallet. Someone even made a website about this shit and of course, most everyone had too much butt paper. Go figure.

Some greedy good for nothings also tried to make a profit to “help their family”, only to get the banhammer from the Feds for selling Charmin at a 1200% markup on eBay. Amateurs.

You can find some pseudo-intellectual bullshit in the media about comfort and the bullwhip effect, yada yada - this is the nice way of saying people are retards and controlled by their reptilian impulses.

Many lulz will ensue in the coming months when things calm down and all the butt cucks try to return their paper paradise to Walmart, only to be told no and to gtfo.
My neighbor has been entertaining herself by engaging in toilet paper hoarding. She has 14 pallets and can’t even park her car in the garage anymore.
by TauKitty April 21, 2020
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Hoard Diving

The act of diving into someone's hoard. Usually for fun or profit.

Similar to dumpster diving, but instead of a dumpster, it's a private residence packed full of crap.
Pedro went hoard diving in Valencia and found a dead cat and some movie posters from 1981.

Rescuers had to hoard dive to get to the fat old man buried under his hoard.
by dconder July 28, 2011
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patient hoarding

Keeping patients coming back for as long as you can, for the rest of their lives if at all possible. The goal is to keep a steady stream of patients coming in, by keeping as many patients on your list as possible, so as to maximize your weekly income. You don't want to completely cure them, or they might decide they don't need you anymore. You just need to make them feel like they're making progress, slowly but surely.

Psychiatrists and therapists are especially notorious for this. They will often make you feel that your condition is incurable, although treatable. Of course, some people, including those with chemical imbalances, may need a lifelong course of treatment. But some others, who may just be going through a difficult time in their lives, may not.

Some doctors do want to see their patients get cured and move on, if possible. But some (the patient hoarders) want to keep as many patients coming back as possible, for as long as possible.
As long as this doctor continues her practice of patient hoarding, you will have to make appointments well in advance because she will be booked solid for weeks, or even months, at a time.
by TheSageOne April 13, 2017
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Hoard

There's three definitions for this word

1. a treasure
2. A collection
3. A trash pile
1. " You've got a hoard of gold!"
2. " why do you have a hoard of stickers?"
3. " I have to get rid of this hoard."
by Siblings_Fight October 3, 2023
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tab-hoarding

Refers to the overall habit of reluctantly keeping multiple internet-browsing tabs open at the same time, for a long duration of time. Often this is done as a way to temporarily save & set aside the tabs for later use. This is because the individual intended to permanently close it after they were done using it.

Note: The individual in question (called a "tab-hoarder"), does not necessarily have to have all the different tabs opened in the same window, at the same time, to be considered "tab-hoarding".

It should also be noted that there is no scientifically agreed-upon consensus on the minimum number of tabs & time duration required for one to identify as "tab-hoarding". However, what is clear is the fact that "tab-hoarding" is a very normal behavior, especially in environments requiring people to regularly use the internet for multiple purposes.
My computer's so slow. Maybe I should stop tab-hoarding.

or

Tab-hoarding is normal. Everyone does it.
by daWolfe October 2, 2022
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dragon's hoard

An excessive wealth (namely money) kept only to one individual or group.
“There’s a dragon’s hoard of junk in here.”

“The higher-ups are not giving up any of their dragon's hoard.”
by EggySpaghetti August 11, 2023
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Dragon hoard

An absurd amount of fucking pocket change, typically found in people's cupholders, or customers who are asses.
"Damn Mike! You got a big-ass dragon hoard in your car!"

"Ugh, here comes that one customer, Bill, with his fucking dragon hoard."
by Tparrett8 March 26, 2025
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