Twilight

A captivating book by Stephenie Meyer, but a bit in the blue about the muddled description of vampires. I'm guessing that she either did not research vampires and vampirism carefully or did not care about the myth-facts, for there were several gaping plot holes throughout the book. Also, it took several exact elements from Anne Rice's book The Vampire Lestat, my point being the trite unoriginality of Edward and Bella's relationship and the too exact similarities between Edward Cullen and Lestat DeLioncourt. The precursor to the sequal New Moon.

"You are exactly my brand of herion. . . " - Edward Cullen, Twilight.

"This is a. . . .um. . . . *big* Jeep you have," Isabella Swan, Twilight.

by Mushroom Hat May 22, 2007

Twilight

(n.) a book created by Stephenie Meyer, focusing on the characters Bella Swan and Edward Cullen.

Most of the people who have given this book's fan base a bad name are the never-readers. These are the people who didn't read it until after watching the movie. These are the whiny tween fangirls who gush about how "like, O M E Edward is so hot and I'm going to marry him some day and he'll love me forever because I'm better than Bella Slut-face and then I'll be a vampire and oh my Robbie Pattinson and Taylor Lautner are so awesome I love run-ons!"

The actual fans of the book live in reality, and are more supportive of the side characters that are more interesting and less cliche- for example, Carlisle, Jasper, and Alice.

Also, the true fans laugh along when twilighter jokes are made. We laugh, we TELL these jokes, and we READ OTHER F***ING BOOKS. That's right, girls and boys. There are other book's out there! Try Ender's Game, try Sword of Truth, try Harry frickin' Potter! Just move on already! Stephenie Meyer has a different- and far better- book out, you know. Or if you want something very different, try Jodi Picoult! I don't care! Just shutthef**up and MOVE THE HELL ON!

YOU ARE NOT A FAN IF YOU ONLY READ THIS ONE SERIES!

You have nothing else to compare it to, therefore you can NOT say it is the best! You are not a fan, you are a groupie!

Fangirl: "OME can you name a better book in the world than Twilight or any of it's prequels? I don't THINK so!"

Fan of Books: "Um, I think you mean sequels, and actually, while Twilight is a good story, there are many that are far better. Here read this."

Fangirl: "Like, what IS this. Ah! Big words!"

Fan of Books: "Um, well, the title is on the--"

Fangirl: "Shuddup! I shun you, you suck! (Oooh suckvampirebloodEdwardRobertPattinson I WILL RAPE YOU!!)

by MorallyFlexibleMe June 9, 2009

tailing

Rhis is when you have a penis and you push it in between your legs and make it look like a tail. then someone gives you a wedgie and when your penis hurts who ever gave you the wedgie has to now give you a blowjob.(works better with a big penis)

When i was iwth my friends they payed me and my friends 20$ each to tail each other. So first i got tailed and it hurt, but then i had to tail him and he has such a hairy rod, balls, gooch, and ass so right when he cummed they held me down and he stuck his ass in my face. and this is tailing

by wedgie June 20, 2007

tilingo

old fashioned Spanish word that means that you are a cry-baby, generally used by people over eighty.

Abuela: Maria Eugenia! Acepta que esta palabra no estaba definida. No seas tilinga!

by Morsi April 24, 2005

Twilight Fauxn

A person obsesed with the Twilight movies who may or may not have read the actual books. Only like the series because of Taylor Lautner's frequent half-nudity in the films, or because they drool at the sight of Robert Pattinson. (Note: usually a (pre)teen girl, but can also be boys with a fetish for Kristen Stewart.) The opposite of a TrueLight Fan.

Fan 1: OMJ JUST SAW NEW MOON TAYLOR IS SOOOOOOOO HAWT!!!!!!! TEAM JACOB ALL THA WAY <3 <3 <3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fan 2: OMC U SUCK TEAM EDWARD PWNS!!! FUTURE MRS. CULLEN RITE HERRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111

Fan 3: what twilight fauxns...

by lolwat? November 29, 2009

Twilight

The story of an emotionally disturbed girl's choice between necrophilia and bestiality, with pedophilic undertones.

Edward: Ancient Vampire.
Jacob: Werewolf.
Bella: Human girl.

Bonus: Jacob falls in love with Bella's baby... While it's still a baby.

Twilight is the product of a seriously repressed mind.

by kyrieleison September 25, 2010

Twilight

Twilight is an ultra-popular saga consisting of 4 books by Stephanie Meyer. Mainly appreciated by girls from age 8-16, the series has made billions of dollars in films and other merchandise. However, no matter how "great" the fans make it seem, the writing is actually quite poor and the plot is boring and unoriginal. The actual definition of "saga" (a word commonly used to describe the series) is "a long story of heroic achievement", which is definitely NOT what Twilight is. The protagonist is a plain girl named Bella with no personality or talent (besides being incredibly boring and uninteresting). She ends up falling in love with a vampire, Edward (who is also quite boring and one-dimensional). Many of the fans of Twilight adore this character, saying he's 'hot'.
These books set bad examples for society. For instance, Bella is willing to DIE than not be with Edward. This is emphasizing the idea that having a boyfriend is the most important thing in life, and that women should be protected like material.
The series is often compared to another ultra-popular series, Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling. In contrast to Twilight, these books are great. Go read them.

An edited exerpt from Twilight
Edward: OHMYGOD, Bella, go jump off a cliff, I hate you.
Bella: Okay, my darling Eddy! I love you sooooooo much I would die for you!
-bella jumps off cliff-
Edward: OMG, Bella, how can you be so stupid!?!?!
Bella: -sobbing- I'M SORRY EDWARD! I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH NEVER LEAVE ME!!!!
Edward: I love you too. Now go away I hate you.

by huergbjk December 24, 2010