Jared (homeless guy)

Jared! The homeless guy down the street! He got kicked out by his parents for no apparent reason?… Anyway he’s now working for Walter where he keeps accidentally breaking the sink, he’s trying to save up for college but let’s be honest he’s 23 and never gonna get in college. (He also looks kind gay)

El caca: Look, it’s a homeless guy!
Walter: No that’s just Jared (homeless guy).
El caca: Oh, Look! It’s Jared !
Walter: Yeah Jared, that homosexual.

by ELCACAISAPIECEOFSHIT October 29, 2022

Jared

Jared is always the name of a doomsday cult leader. Jared is, contrary to most cult leaders, a snivelling goblin man, who has somehow amassed a large following. He is usually accompanied by 2-3 bodyguards carrying weapons of some kind - in some cases, Jared will needlessly kill one of the bodyguards for some fucking reason.

In terms of appearance, Jareds often lack shirts (though they occasionally wear jackets), and have either scars or tattoos. They are rarely overly muscular, often having pathetic arms.
Fucking Jared.

"It is I, Jared, the exalted leader of the Order of The Sun."
"..."
"Fucking Jared."

by piss boy jr February 19, 2022

Jared

Jared has a little dick and is tall and he is very dumb and doesn't know what he is doing with his life

you can use it in a sentence when like you are eating you are jared

by namalada March 7, 2022

Jared

A gamer boy who is into older women, loves to watch anime, and has a big dick. He thinks he is funny, but is only funny because he laughs at himself. Has big muscles and is very strong basically a hot stud.

Jared has a massive dick.

by usswidowmaker5 January 25, 2022

Jared

The illest nigga God created.. has more smarticles than every contestant on High Q combined.. Lover to Pickles the prettiest princess of all the land.

Yeah he's cool but he's no Jared. You can't figure it out? Call Jared he already knows the answer..

by TURBOLINSKII February 27, 2021

Jared

A dead beat who cheats on every girl he gets he just wants nudes and to fuck

Girl: (says hey to Jared)
Jared: send nudes “I love you”

by Kissmewithyoureyesclosed October 17, 2019

Jared Emery

Sort of a k/d warrior imo.

jared emery el margarita

by kdmatters:) November 14, 2020