knuckleball wanker

Someone who reckons they're the next reckoning of Cristiano Ronaldo because they once hit a football that moved a bit in the air

'Salim has started wearing Nike Hypervenoms because he reckons he's good enough to play professional football.'
'What a knuckleball wanker!'

by MaliaMadness2020 July 15, 2016

little wanker

When a midget (Preferrably British) masturbates.

He's so short. He's definitely a little wanker.

by handydan April 23, 2014

Wankers Respect

To accomplish something or gain recognition from your peers which usually derives from a dare or a hap-hazard scenario which you would not put yourself into.

'John's got laid by a 72 year old? He gets some wankers respect for that.'

by Middsyuwe January 24, 2009

Wanker Hands

Dispite sounding offensive the term 'Wanker Hands' is actually a endearing and affectionate phrase commonly used in North West of England to describe someone who has very nice hands.

Me; I see you've got Wanker Hands.
You; Why thank you. I grew them myself.

by the_riveria_kid December 10, 2010

Bloody Wanker

A phrase that Americans think British/Irish people use when in fact no-one in their right mind uses the word bloody and wanker together.

"Bloody" is quite a mild swear word whereas " wanker" is quite harsh.

The two words just don't go together.
Saying " bloody wanker" on the internet screams "I'm an American!"

Them: God you're a bloody wanker!

Me: You're an American aren't you?

by Mrs Pants April 6, 2010

Porsche wanker

Someone whose life revolves around their Porsche. They go out wearing a Porsche hat, has a Porsche key chain to wear around their neck and basically eats breathes and sleeps Porsche. Does not have a girlfriend but refers to the Porsche as The wife. Tells friends that the Porsche is The Starship Enterprise

Hey, I'm off out for a blast with the wife in The Enterprise. Yes I'm a Porsche Wanker. Beep beep. Wroooom....

by Anonanon555 July 28, 2016

Cunting Wankers

British term for Americans and America in general.

America is full of cunting wankers

by AnonFuckers January 9, 2009