Texas suitcase

At a ski resort, it’s a way of using your pole straps to carry your skis by putting your straps around each end of the skis, to carry them sideways by holding the poles next to you like a suitcase, common with tourists that don’t ski often. The normal way to carry skis is over your shoulder upright, so you don’t hit anyone with them.

Look at Jerry carrying that texas suitcase, he almost took out a kid when he turned around!

by tomato1324 April 2, 2023

Texas starfish

The Texas starfish is a sexual act that involves the lady being tied up in a star shape and getting violently fucked

Dude me and Stacey we used the Texas starfish

by Fuckherrightnthapussy April 10, 2023

Textxiety

The feeling of anxiety and anticipation you get when you send a text message to someone and await their response, especially if it's an important or sensitive message.

"I have major textxiety waiting for my boss to reply to my message about that project."

by ToastonBeans April 12, 2023

Textpectation

Textpectation is the anticipation or expectation of receiving a text message, often resulting in frequent checking of one's phone.

I have textpectation after applying for the job; I keep checking my phone, hoping for an interview invitation.

by Lane-Games April 20, 2023

textssay

A text message so long that no normal person would ever take the time to read it.

Person 1: *sends this text*: What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little shit? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt… (cont.)
Person 2: Bruh why’d you send me that long ass textssay, I ain’t reading allat

by collegeboardwhore April 28, 2023

Texas Steamboat

When you pry open the hole at the tip of the penis. Scoop the fluid out with a meth pipe and smoke it.

The wife is gonna pull a texas steamboat after dinner on Friday.

by Giggles the clown May 1, 2023

Texas

Texas is an average state in America. Yeah, we have a million races of people here, but at least they’re accepted. There are meth heads and drug addicts, but those are practically everywhere nowadays. We do use y’all a lot. We like hanging out, bbq, and late night television watching. It’s quite fun here, but it sucks when you hear what other people say about our Texan pride. We love our state, get over it you stupid person from Oklahoma. We don’t have Oklahoma, but sometimes they’re just so rude about us, we have to. I live in an average suburban area in south Texas. I am in the Houston area but not living in Houston. We do love cooking! (Especially BBQ, it’s just our culture) I can’t believe I have to say this, but it isn’t the 20th century anymore. We don’t ride horses everywhere (honestly that would help the environment though), wear cowboy gear every day (maybe when we celebrate or go to the rodeo), drink too much beer, and say yee haw. I don’t think I’ve ever used that seriously in my life. Every state has flaws. Also, we aren’t the only country that decided to join a larger group. Don’t act like we’re so weak and terrible. Also, don’t get started with the George W. Bush crap. People are very shitty and I could name from terrible people from every other state too. Fuck you. But otherwise, just please stop harassing Texans. We are cool and have good sweet tea, just chill with us.

Lily: I’m from Texas!
John: Cool, I’m from Arkansas. What’s it like there?
Lily: It’s pretty nice here. One second it’s hot, the next it’s even hotter.

by Cheese milk blender May 13, 2023