Device masturbation

noun; the act of being on an internet enabled device for no reason other than the pleasure of oneself.

"There's been a lot of device masturbation, if you will, and it needs to stop. I know your just updating your Facebook 15 times a minute, and there is no reason for it." My history professor.

by Crazybmws September 22, 2011

assisted masturbation

The act of having another individual whack you off, can be of the male or female variety.

Person 1: Dude! My girl hit me up with some assisted masturbation
Person 2: Noice!

by therealOGmexican July 26, 2016

National Masturbation Day

April 19th, national jerk off day for everyone!

🖐️🍆💦

🖐️🐱💦

"Hey Brianna, it's national masturbation day tomorrow!"

by Gloul April 16, 2021

Masterbational

Something sooooo totally badass that right at that moment you want to drop your pants and have a massive wank.

Star Trek was so masterbational that I wanked super hard right in the theatre and shot the screen with my dick cheese.

by BuGzeeYY June 14, 2009

Masturbation

The act of pleasuring yourself through fingers on hand motions

Girl 1:Oh I masturbated last night and it felt so good

Boy:I just masturbated off of what you said

Girl:I love masturbation

by DatHorseBoi July 9, 2018

masturbation

Sex with someone have known your entire life. except instead of a vagina he has fingernails...gross.

i wonder if mr. rogers ever rocked his casbah..hmm masturbation is silly.

by J Boy August 24, 2009

status masterbation

A facebook, twitter, or other social media status update that serves only for the psychosocial gratification of the poster, not unlike sexual masterbation.

-Did you see Lisa's most recent facebook status update about how happy she is with her life and how thankful she is for everyone?

-Yeah, I did, and I can't stop reading it. I have such a fetish for reading status masterbation.

by andmybow February 20, 2014