Toilet Boner

That awkward moment when your dick gets slightly to hardcore erect, and it hits the bottom of the toilet seat.

*Mom walks in*
“OH MY GOD CHAD WHAT ARE YOU DOING???”
“Chill out Mom. I got a toilet boner. Just cleaning my meat.”
“Oh okay, understood.”

by IFap232BluntsIG August 10, 2018

to Drown the toilet

To take a water shit

I got diarrhea from those tacos last night and had to drown the toilet this morning.

by Mr. santorum May 24, 2012

toilet browsing

The act of taking a device to the toilet and spending many hours there, not pooping/peeing

Dave took his laptop to the bathroom and was toilet browsing until his sister caught him.

by Gaming withcall June 4, 2017

Toilet paper

Something that has been out of stock just about everywhere this year.

example:
someone: *carries 5 bags of toilet paper out of store*
shelves: *empty*
~the next day~
*lorry comes with bags of toilet paper just as the store opens*
everyone runs into the store, grabbing all the toilet paper they can carry.
someone else: iS iT bLaCk FrIdAy?

by vibing.moth385 March 14, 2020

Blame Toilet

The total & complete blaming of someone or something.

Dude, you know the Great Depression II that we're in? I'm blaming Bill Clinton for it because of his policies on NAFTA.
Me: Too bad for you-you should also be blaming George Bush I, G. Bush II and Obama. Stop using Clinton as your own blame toilet!

by Bangboy January 22, 2011

toilet ping

The act of a male urinating at night without ambient light, trying to locate the interior of the toilet. Directional adjustments are made until the male hears the splashing of interior toilet water. Once the toilet has been located, the male relaxes and sets flow rate to full.

Fred woke up from a deep slumber and walked to the bathroom. It was completely dark, and he used a toilet ping to avoid a mess on the floor.

by nlan1 August 14, 2010

the angry toilet

This is a modified version of a blumpie. Except while you're receiving oral pleasure the person performing oral will also be laid beneath you while you remain in a squatting like position and let both loads on to the person who will be a very angry one indeed when you fail to mention you wanted to take a shit on them. Making them your angry toilet :D

I'm gonna have that whore be the angry toilet

by Raging Repeating Raping Rhinos January 9, 2021